The Effects of Nursing on Nurses
Hi, welcome to my blog post. I have never had a blog post get more than 50 comments, so I am a bit overwhelmed. After responding to many comments, here is a note:
Note: I wrote this blog entry at the end of my 3rd 12 hour shift in three days. I was tired and I was emotional. It is a blog post, not an “article.” It is not researched or sourced, it is purely opinion.
The point of this post is that nurses (and many other professions) need to take the time to practice self care and to encourage one another to practice self care.
My biggest mistake in this post (and there are many) was to use “her” or “she” when I should have used “they” or them.” I ignored my male coworkers, and I should not have. You have my apologies, and I have corrected the post. I have left “she” and “her” in place in the portion where I talk about my coworker.
I have read every comment posted and deleted some very nasty comments that were not helpful to conversation. If you feel this is the place to spew your vitriol, it is not.
August 11, 2013
This morning, while I was giving report to the day shift nurse taking over my patients, she burst into tears.
She’s going to miss her children’s hockey play offs due to our strictly enforced every other weekend schedules. You work every other weekend, no more, no less, unless you are going to college (I work every weekend because I’m in college). She’s their hockey coach, and inevitably, each year, their last game falls on a day their mother has to work. I’ve come in early for her before.
So I offered to come in on my night off for an hour and a half so she could get to the game. I’m coming in that early because I know she won’t be done charting.
She turned me down until another day RN got involved. I reminded my coworker I only live a mile from the hospital, and it really wasn’t a big sacrifice for me. She finally agreed, and calmed down. We got permission from the charge nurse.
Nursing is one of the largest professions in the world. If you don’t know a nurse, I’m really surprised. Nurses talk a lot about the rewards of nursing. Catching that vital sign, saving lives, providing comfort, but nurses, by nature, are taught to martyr themselves on the altar of nursing.
When I was a new grad, I hated coming to work so much that I would wish I’d get hit by a car on my way to work just to get out of work. One night, while checking medication sheets, I confessed this to some experienced nurses and found out some of them still felt the same way.
In nursing, it is NORMAL to have days where you wake up and just can’t mentally and emotionally face the day at work. I swear, the only other people who can understand this are nurses.
Nursing is emotionally, physically and mentally taxing, and some days you run too low on what you can give emotionally, physically and mentally. That minor back injury you don’t want to report to HR because you don’t want it on your record. Having a patient with constant diarrhea who can’t get out of bed and needs to be physically rolled and cleaned several times an hour. The cold you got from the two-year old someone brought in. The sorrow that comes from supporting someone who has just found out they were dying, holding in your own tears so you could wipe theirs. In one day, all of those patients could be yours.
I don’t know a nurse who hasn’t taken a mental health day. Some do it by requesting more vacation than others. Some do it by calling in sick, but it’s all time off because we are too drained to give anymore.
So if you know a nurse, and that nurse mentions to you that they feel like calling in because they just can’t take it another day, don’t give them a hard time. Especially if you have an 8-5 job with weekends off or some other really great schedule. The 12 hour shifts nurses work mean we miss the entire holiday we work with our families. Night shift nurses have to choose between holiday dinners or sleep. Often, if a nurse chooses to sleep rather than go to the holiday dinner, guilt ensues. Even though I’ve told my mother-in-law repeatedly that every nurse has to work holidays, she makes a point to say how horrible it is my husband has to be alone for a few hours. What about me? Working my ass off while everyone else celebrates?
We work hard. We are intentionally understaffed by our hospitals to improve profit, even if the hospital is a non-profit. We help people at the worst times of their lives, and often have no way to debrief, to get it off our chests. We don’t just bring warm blankets and pills. We are college educated, degreed professionals who are often treated like uneducated, lazy servants. We get sexually harassed by our patients. We get groped, punched, cut, I even know of a nurse on my floor being strangled (she survived).
Nursing can be rewarding. But nursing is a fucking hard job. If you are afraid of healthcare rationing, you should know it is already happening. Nurses are unable to give everyone the care they need, so patients with smaller problems may not get the same level of care. A nurse may be pressed to only give the minimum amount of care to a patient if they have 5 or more very sick patients. If you don’t want healthcare rationing, talk to your local hospitals about their nurse to patient ratios. Talk to your doctors. If you hear of legislation to support nurse to patient ratios, vote for it. Support it.
So if a nurse needs a day off, you support them. If you’re in a position to help like I was this morning, do so. If you are a nurse, go easier on yourself when you think about the things you didn’t finish, or the things you should have said. It’s a 24-hour a day job and you don’t have to do it alone.
As of January 27, 2014, this post is no longer accepting comments. I am doing this as a practice of self care. Tending to this blog post, several times a day, has become a burden. It has had over 2 million hits, and I am tired. The post has become a platform for people who want to propel their own agendas and are using my space to do so. Thanks to all who said such nice things, and to everyone else, go write your own blog.
Posted on August 11, 2013, in Nursing and tagged Health care, Nursing, registered nurse. Bookmark the permalink. 2,612 Comments.
ofcourseitsaboutyou 
As nurses we ran into compassion fatigue and it would be helpful if our employers have available programs to help us.
wah, wah, wah….you act like you’re the only people working long hours and holidays. Plenty more people do just as much for a fraction of the pay of nurses…take a look around the hospital, you don’t have to look very far, the people you are bossing around and doing the real dirty work are working for a fraction of the nurses pay. Jeesh.
Yes they are, and not all of them are doing it alone. There are plenty of nurses who step up and do the work or go in and help the other employee with the tasks. What you obviously don’t realize is that we are held accountable for the employees we outrank…they are riding on our license. And you have no idea what our responsibilities are at any given moment. You may see nurses sitting at the desk while the tech is running ragged…but we have legal documentation that must be done. If it’s not documented after we assess and provide care…guess what? Legally it has not been done and nurses can end up in court over a complaint. That and they have cut staffing to the bare minimum so we don’t even have enough nursing staff to do the teamwork that is needed to provide safe care for patients. So your wah’ing at us is irrelevant.
Thank you for a well needed “non-article”. All of what you said it true. One thing you did not mention and I assume it is because you don’t have semi-adult children is the gilt trip when they get together and bemoan what THEY put up with while I worked. They had to help baby sit each other, they missed me being a soccer/rugby/ any-school-activity mom. They attended school functions alone or with only one parent (my husband is also a nurse) Holidays were the same way.
I primarily worked 12 hour night shifts and your description is very accurate. The other side of working nights is trying to give it all to both the daylight family and the night time job. Well, after 20 years, I can honestly say…it does not work. I am now retired but have had my share of nurses who are exhausted and suffering from sleep deprivation. They may think they are awake, but they are not. Some don’t care about appearances and just fall asleep where they sit. Their work suffers and other already tired and weary nurses pick up the slack and work that much harder covering for them. I could believe that a nurse invented the “power nap”.
Nursing is very rewarding but it is not a glamorous job. It comes with a lot of pit falls and disappointments. There is nothing so sad as being told that the nurse you are giving report to is getting a new non-nursing job and is thrilled to “get out” of nursing. Sad for the profession, but happy for the new ex-nurse.
I am recently retired. Do I miss nursing? yes. Do I miss the “mine-field” politics, the crazy work schedules, the treatment of nursing by hospital administration, the constantly changing policies and rules, and the pressure of juggling family and professional life? Not at all.
As nurses we ran into compassion fatigue, it would be helpful if our employers have programs to help us in this area.
AMEN!!!!!!!!
“Don’t be a nurse, it is the hardest, and most unappreciated job you can do. Taking care of someone who is sick never ensures that you will be given the gratitude you deserve because people just don’t get it.” (My mother)
I obviously didn’t listen to the guiding word’s my mother said to me many years ago before I was nurse, perhaps I should have. Being a nurse has so many responsibilities, yet the wage is crap and patient load exceeds what 1 human being can possibly do to care for their patients. I loved nursing, at one time, but then as i was exposed to the harsh reality of nurses crucifying each other, people blaming you for their loved one’s illnesses and that the reality that when it comes to someone messing stuff up, it’s always your fault. I learned the hard way. Working in the ER for a number of years, i almost left nursing altogether. Now i work 3 jobs, all different from each other and i am able to tolerate my job a little but easier. 12 hour shifts are emotionally draining and there’s a reason we only work 3 days. Because if we worked anymore we would literally lose our minds, and just so everyone knows, never expect anyone to understand your job, because no one ever will.
Why, oh why didn’t we listen to our Moms? Mine was an LPN, and a great nurse. She was disabled by the age of 59 with back problems resulting from years of lifting heavy patients and equipment, etc. Nursing is physically and emotionally draining. I was just told by my own doctor that I had to quit bedside nursing due to recurrent back injuries and a tumor in my spinal cord (neck). But I am a nurse, it’s part of me, who I am, and I love contact with patients. Looking at a supervisory position in a SNF. Hard decision. Best to you ShanaSue
My daughter is an RN who works twelve hour shifts, 7p to 7a. She has not been healthy mentally or physically since she has worked this shift. Twelve hour shifts are hard on anyone but the emotional and physical toll these shifts take on a nurse make one wonder if they are worth it, but as with most people, the fact of trying to support a family makes her have to put her needs and wants on the back burner.
I read your blog and the following comments and I felt like I had written them or said them out loud to coworkers . I love my profession but not what it has evolved into. Yes I did choose this after being a CNA and have been an RN for 43 years. But outsiders to healthcare, don’t have a clue. I wonder if Bill or Anna or the rest of the detractors are those that complained to administration because their nurse didn’t come fast enough to answer the lights? Have you ever been told ” I don’t care if your other patient was in a code”. And no, OScar, I am not saying that other professions arent difficult or demanding, but outside of healthcare someone’s life does not depend on you every day.
As for changing the way things are, not as easy as you think,the nursing staff(RN,LPN,CNA,EMT) do not have as much say in our practice as thought. There is not much support and we are considered interchangeable and expendable, even by those managers that are RN’s. They have forgotten how to be nurses. And the only thing that matters is the bottom line. Even the unions have not made a lot of headway in right to work states. I have gone to work on weekends and holidays while you are at home enjoying them. I will bet that your work doesn’t include being insulted, spit on, manhandled, groped, complained to and about by patients and family members. The nurse also does bathes, frequent bed changes, turns because there are not that many CNAs available. In my job in MICU I do the feeding, the bath, pick up trays pass them out, transport the patient in their beds,chart verify and carry out orders to name a few items in my day. Shadow a nurse for a day and I will bet your eyes get yanked open. We are a very hardy breed with a value system and sense of humor all our own. Even when we complain about conditions it is with our patients in mind. We want good and safe care delivered and at this point it isn’t happening. When a nurse calls it quits, it’s because the last bit of her has been used up in caring for someone else, they have given every last bit of their emotion, knowledge, time and energy and they are long past running on empty, a feeling I wager none of you outside healthcare, will ever experience.
So many of you have expressed so well what I am feeling. I have been a nurse for 35 years and have worked in healthcare since I was 16 for a total of 42 years. Nursing has changed so much over the years. Some of these changes have been good and others have been terrible. Gone are our nursing caps and white pantyhose!! Gone are the days when nurses were treated like nuns. We no longer have to clean the hospital, sterilize the equiptment and clean needles.Being a spinster is no longer a requirement to attend nursing school
The stress in our profession is unbelievable. We often leave feeling like failures.If only we did this or that, remembered every little thing we needed to and got it all done in our 8,10 or 12 hour shifts. Our BP’s skyrocket and our bladders almost burst. But we do it because we want to make a difference in someone’s life, make them as comfortable as possible and educate them in a healthy lifestyle. Providing emotional support, compassion and empathy as well as the encouragement to fight to get well or to accept what cannot be changed.
Being an older nurse, I am not valued as much as the youngins. I’m not as fast, not as computer savy and have the nerve to make more money. There is a big push to get rid of the older nurses and staff with new grads with their BSN’s and MS. I greatly value education and admire those with their degrees.Unfortunately the art of nursing has been lost in all of this progress. I feel like a glorified computer clicker. That’s all you hear at the nurse’s station, click,click,click. The demands of documentation take us away from the bedside, where most us prefer to be.
I worked an “8” hour shift last night. No break of course and then I had to punch out then stay almost 2 hours to complete my blasted documentation. But. I caught two med errors before they happened and would have been harmful to the patient. That felt good. What didn’t feel so good was being very nervous my nurse manager would find me still working, my tachycardia at the thought of being reprimanded and ridiculed for not getting out on time.
What has happened to the old fashioned professional standards we once had? Cell phones are rampant with many nurses. They chat in the med room, shop online during their shift and conduct many of their personal affairs at work.Inappropriate conversations about sex, drinking,etc are common place.It can be a challenge to give report with all the socializing going on.
I am feeling burned out and no longer valued as a veteran nurse. I am ashamed to admit I have also wished for an accident on the way to work more than once just to avoid the unbearble.I have fantasized about being in a less stressful and threatening career .With the closure of so many psychiatric facilities and alcohol and drug treatment facilities, we are forced to carry a heavy load of med-surg patients as well as detoxing patients. Often, we are in danger of getting seriously injured by out of control patients.and sometimes their family members. Where are the boundaries that used to dictate you left quietly when visiting hours were over,and visitors were limited to a safe number. How about the days when dogs weren’t allowed and neither were children under 12.. Back when nurses commanded respect from the public and were not verbally abused by patients and visitors?
Early retirement sounds so enticing.
I do love “true nursing” and care a great deal about my patients. I want to be at the bedside, not clicking away on some blasted computer that is not user friendly and takes twice as long to execute an order as the old pen and paper system. Computers certainly do have their advantages, but they can’t take the place of a nurse holding your hand before a procedure.
I’m terrified of what’s coming down the pike. The fools who wrote and backed the Affordable Care Act clearly have no clue or what’s actually involved in the delivery of clinical healthcare or how to fix our severely broken system, it’s just going to continue to get worse. Most aspects of clinical healthcare delivery are physically and emotionally demanding, I don’t care if you are an RN, LPN, PCA or whatever. In many cases the system is so broken that it’s impossible to deliver consistent, high quality patient care. The constant demands to do more with less, the annual incremental increase in the amount of idiotic, non-productive documentation, and the continual staffing squeeze are killing both healthcare professionals and their patients every day.
You said it all, I agree with you. Same things happening to us at our hospital. Can’t do teamwork without staff to make up the team. Heloooo. It’s just a business and we are just pawn in their game. Sad 😦
Hey, Jan! Why attack teachers? Both professions are difficult and rewarding. If we choose to work, we should realize there
Are going to be difficult days.
I feel for you. I really do.I’m a Doctor and have my own office.BUT I don’t have sick days I can use nor vacation days, nor… you get the idea. If I don’t work, our office makes no money. That not only affects me, but our staff as well. No great answers. Since you have time you CAN take, take it. Get away. Find a hobby you can immerse yourself in. You have a very stressful job. You have to deal with idiot Drs like me, patients, head nurses, other nurses, hospital staff, and relatives of patients. TAKE TIME OFF WHEN YOU CAN!! We need and respect your services. Oh, and my daughter just started nursing. Right now she is “high” on all the new. I’m waiting for the day when she feels the stress. Hopefully she will manage it well. If you aren’t in the heath care business, one word of advice…..BE NICE :). a kind word goes a loooooong way to help us deal with this profession. Trust us, it isn’t all the glory you may think it is 🙂
Yes, I realize I hit send too quickly, but my point remains the same.
So true, I’m in tears because sadly we are so unappreciated !
Melissa I have also read some very hateful comments and it saddens me. Even some of the comments from other nurses have been hurtful. I wish I had a “nurse cam” so that I can show the world what we do. Many still appreciate us, and those that don’t may one day understand when they or a loved one is in the hospital. From one nurse to another, I appreciate what you do and I know the job is never easy. I chose this job to help people and that is what keeps me going. If hospitals would fix the staffing issues and equipment issues our jobs would be more tolerable and patient care would greatly improve. I am human and I cannot make up for the failures in the hospital system. I have to adapt and set priorities and choose which call light to respond to first. I know I cannot make every patient happy, but I can only try. God sees us and knows what we deal with. I am thankful he opened up another door for me in nursing.
You have changed my mind. I was thinking of going into nursing school and now have decided this is not for me… Thankyou for being honest!
Good decision Renee! There are many other important and more lucrative means to make a living and still be in the healthcare field. Best wishes for you
I loved reading this. Thank you
You have my sympathy and appreciation. My daughter-in-law is a surgical nurse and when she isn’t working extended shifts she’s on call, which is like house arrest. She and my son are in their late twenties and he works almost as many hours as an engineer, and has to travel a lot on top of it. She saves lives everyday and he produces industrial machines that help our crippled economy to survive and hopefully recover. Trouble is, neither of them have a personal life and they don’t know how they can start a family or take care of children. They both know they can’t live like this long term, it is not a sustainable life style. On the other hand, they don’t know how either of them can quit their jobs with the massive student loans they have accumulated to become what they are. Unfortunately, their story is all too common among the “lucky ones” who get jobs in today’s economy. Its the “new reality” for the middle class in this country while the stock market reaches record levels, CEO’s get 40 times what they got in 2009, the gap between rich and poor gets wider, middle class wages stagnate for 2 decades, and the middle class shrinks. Unfortunately, you are one of the lucky ones to have a job. There are many nurses and other Science, Technology, Engineering, and Math graduates who can’t find work. My daughter-in-law’s sister-in-law (her brother’s wife) is one. My husband,and several of his cousins are others. But, those are different stories.
Wow. FIRST let me say that I much appreciate nurses. My baby sister (a flight nurse for a major Air Evac company, and now teaching college), my sis in law (an ER nurse with at least two jobs) and my medic brother, give me chances to see medicine from ‘the other side’. As well, I was a first responder and rescue tech in addition to my regular job, for years. I get it, I do…..but…
I find your post to be whiny. I worked 20 years at a steel mill. I knew going in that it would be a VERY hard job. Turned out to be much harder than I thought. You were “tired at the end of three 12 hour shifts”? Girl, I worked 12 hours, at a minimum, anywhere from four days in a row to 12. My ‘record’ was 80 days without a day off. You had coworkers who were groped and unappreciated? I had coworkers who were dismembered and unappreciated. You didn’t like working nights? Join the club. You didn’t like losing patients? I didn’t either!!! And, I’m pretty sure you had more training in how to deal with losing a p/t than I did. I could go on, ad nauseum, but I won’t.
Thing is, we went into these jobs willingly. Yes, I think ALL nurses are unappreciated and occasionally get treated like crap by patients and staff alike. And you knew this beforehand, just like I knew my job would be tough. Maybe both of us were surprised at just how difficult these jobs could be. But we had jobs. I worked at the mill because they paid me a shitload, not because anybody gave a flying f*** about me.
Something I’m doing in my life is to appreciate more and whine less. You..take it from an old guy, appreciate your cats more. Decompress. Or you’re going to wind up old before your time, and bitter.
Okay, after reading some of the comments I have to reply again but to address the comments. To those who work the floor with the nurses…never think you are unappreciated if you are a hard worker because those nurses who are also hard workers appreciate you more than you will ever know because we can’t express our appreciation enough. To the paramedics in the field …ER nurses applaud you, you are on call and ready to go at a moments notice and you are definitely not paid enough to do what you do. To the respiratory therapist …I wish we had one of you where I work at times life would be much easier! To the nurse who thinks you can just move your job and your shifts around and easily be off on holidays and for family or school functions no problem …you have a rare job because no nurse I know can do that so easily! To the nurse who has been in the profession forever and never felt overwhelmed…wow, never met a nurse who could say that before. To the mom who wanted to tell her daughter to “suck it up” I sure hope you didn’t open you mouth and let that foulness out because she just needed a shoulder to lean on and let out her heartbreak…hopefully she never knows your shoulder isn’t really there for her when it comes to work. To all those whose posts I didn’t read…if you are in any area of healthcare and you are a hard worker, you are appreciated even if you are never told. If you decided to put something negative …you might want to evaluate yourself and look around at those who put there all in healthcare and hope when you are the one in need you get someone who puts there all in when caring for you because those are the ones who write blogs like this….not the ones who don’t know squat about bedside manners.
I’m a Respiratory Therapist. I work 12.5 hour night shifts. I miss out on lots of social functions, holidays, & family stuff. I know what it feels like to terminally extubate & turn off the ventilator with family crying at the bedside. The worst part is knowing that people don’t appreciate what we do, not like they should. They don’t think about our mental/emotional/physical sacrifices & struggles. Just wanted to say – I can totally relate …
I can’t believe all these people who are saying “suck it up” or “you shouldn’t have chose this profession”. This woman is simply expressing what a vast majority of nurses think from time to time! We are human and have souls that need feeding once and a while. The amount of life altering things we deal with on a daily basis is draining. I have a tremendous amount of respect for my co workers and other nurses and also try to help out when someone has something going on. We chose this profession because we want to care for people, but the politics of corporations make it hard on us to fully spread our selves evenly between our patients, sometimes too many. So we become stretched too thin and sometimes break. I hope these people who are saying these negative things are not real nurses, because you are the cold, unheartless people we strive not to become.
I will never forget these words, so wise, so true. Thank you for composing my thoughts and feelings without ever having met me. Nursing is honorable, yes! But nursing is fucking hard!!
I graduated nursing school at the age of 20. When I graduated I went directly to work in a ICU for about 6 years and have worked in a ER since. I do love my job, but can definitely relate. I agree, and have often said myself, that no one really understands what we do unless you are a nurse. I think a lot of my family still thinks I pass out pills for a living. I am guilty of saying , more than once, “this place is taking years off my life.” When truly it’s not “the place” but the stressors of the job that come with it. Anyone who is a nurse can understand holding your bladder until you can’t anymore because that patient has been waiting too long for their pain pill and you want to get it for them first , then another need arises. Running to the cafeteria to grab food before it closes in hopes of getting to eat it at some point, just to throw it away at the end of your shift, thinking how it was a waste of your money. Doing everything you as a nurse can do for a patient but still taking the condemning comments regarding things that are truly out of your hands. Dealing with the condemning comments of disgruntled patients when truly their expectations of time and priority are unrealistic but having to give a professional answer instead of the response you would like to give. I do understand that the patients are customers in the field of healthcare. But this is not a drive through at A fast food restaurant. There is a reason that man having a MI went back before you with your stubbed toe. What other profession has to take the heat from the public on things like that and have to apologize for the wait. Being called every name in the book by a intoxicated patient. How do we deal with it? Some days you can just feel you blood pressure going up. Some days you leave the room and laugh because ” that was a new one” “I haven’t been called that before, original I will give them that.” I have seen days when your team is working a pediatric arrest and other patients are standing at there door because they haven’t gotten their pain med fast enough. How do you even begin to explain those feelings you get when dealing with these situations. Sometimes when my husband ask how my day was I may say not good but I can’t even try to explain it. Because without living it, it can’t be understood. But we keep going because nursing is what we do. It’s what we are. We will continue to care for people despite taking the heat from doctors when we try to intervene, from management when we express concerns, from patients for not meeting every expectation. We will keep doing it. We may go home wishing we could have done more. And we will go back the next day as we explain to our children, well as I do my daughter, it’s mommys turn to help the sick people so another mommy or daddy can go home to see there kids.
Well said,i couldn’t have said it better
I shed a tear when reading this. I have been a night shift nurse for many years….and I have worked almost every holiday my entire career. Halloween, July 4th, Easter, Thanksgiving, Christmas, and New Years, to name a few, all the while missing my children grow. Thanks for putting a piece of yourself out there and writing this. It helps immensely to know I am not alone in this blessed, crazy, hard profession.
OMG suck it up! Most nurses work 12h shifts – that’s 3 days out of 7. If you’re so horrible at getting other people to trade with you or taking PTO you can’t get the schedule you want, you don’t deserve to have those days off!
Alex, actually that is no true. Most nurses are scheduled for 12 hour shifts and work past that trying to catch up on paperwork. Also 36 + hours is equal to what most other professionals work, so do you really think we have it good? I was a firefighter before I became a nurse for 12 years paid and a total of 21 years including volunteer time. I never had the stress in my fire profession equal to what a nurse experiences. Sure firefighters have their stressful days, but I always had a meal break, always had time to use the bathroom and had time to rest. Nurses do not get chill time. Many times when I take my break the other nurses are too busy to relieve me so I spend my 30 minute break near my patient’s rooms and often have to get up when I am clocked out. Many times we do not get breaks and are lucky to have a minute to use the bathroom. Try excusing yourself while a doctor is at the bedside of a new admit steadily giving you orders for their care, meanwhile another one of your patients have just returned from surgery and another is hitting the call light to get assistance to a toilet, and another is waiting on pain medicine. You try this for 36 hours a week, and btw for those of us who work nights, if our schedule is not consecutive it ruins that one day off because we are catching up on sleep. The reason many of us do not get the schedules of our choice is that a certain number of nurses must work and we cannot all have those days off. Our schedules are not set, so we are unable to plan for anything until we can see the schedule set in stone or have a word from our supervisor that we received the time off. At my unit only 2 nurses can request for a vacation day at a time, out of close to 50+ nurses in our unit….you do the math. I love my job. I love being a nurse. What I do not appreciate is someone telling me (us) to suck it up. You are not a nurse, so please have some respect.
Nice read but definitely not true for everyone. There’s something called allied health which you find in every hospital, nursing home etc. this nurse is making it seem like they are the only one who is caring for the patient. There are nurse assistants, patient care associates and other allied health professionals who are usually caring for the patient. My personal observation, being that I currently work in one of my city’s more recognized facilities and in their Emergency Department, there is very little to nothing that taxes the nurses because they treat the allied workers like personal assistants. They have very little patient contact except for asking their name, installing an IV cath and giving the occasional medication. I do however know a few who get on their grind and does 100% for their patients and I give my complete respect to those very few nurses. The rest are whiners and much like the writer of this fictional story, are attention seekers. Working 3 days a week is definitely not hard, even on a 12 hour shift. Try doing that 5 days a week or for some, all seven days because of the need to work 2 jobs. Some travel from very far in rain, snow, incredible heat, on foot because they cannot afford a cab or cannot afford to own their own car. the 8 hour shift for the allied worker is definitely NOT 8 hours and would gladly trade for the three day week so they could recover from the swollen feet after running back and forth 5 days a week or to be home with their family during a holiday. Some don’t know what a chair feels like because they are running all day to help multiple patients. I have seen instances where the Allied Health Professional is caring for more than 20 patients yet the Nurse is complaining about the 2 that they have and doesn’t even know their name. The Nurse only knows the patient by either the complaint, the diagnosis of the patient or even their color. Some Allied Health Professionals go to school and get very little sleep. Oh and let me throw this in there again, 5 days a week and sometimes all seven days. So if you want to know what real pain is, ask a Nurse Assistant, Nurse Technician or other Allied Health Professionals who have 95% of the patient contact, who are there to care for the patient, who see the changes in the patient, who clean the patient, who console the patient, who console the family of the patient, who feed the patient, dress the patient, bathe the patient, talk to the patient, wipe the blood from the patient, clean the beds for the patient and sometimes the Allied Health Professional has to clean and prepare the patients who have left us and prepare the rooms for the family to say their last goodbyes. I personally have watched patients slip away right before my eyes while others are sitting in comfortable chairs nearby talking about their vacations or talking about the woes of sitting behind the nurse’s station. I choose to perform in the profession that I am in because I DO make the difference. I am there for the patient. I know that will be me one day. I know that will be my mother one day. I know that will be my father one day. I know it will be my sister or brother one day. I want to make the difference. the Allied Health Professional does all this and yet, the one who sits on a computer and charts all the things YOU do, and take the credit and demand a pat on their back afterwards. Sorry, I don’t think so. Want to feel real pain? Want to know what real taxation on the body and mind is? Want to know what it’s really like to not see your family? Ask a Nurse Assistant, ask a Nurse Technician, ask a Patient Care Technician. They will tell you…..right after they clean up all the mess the other people won’t. Sorry to burst this person’s fantasy bubble but I don’t own a violin to play them a sad tune.
I have been a nurse for 7 years. Working nights, sacrificing sleep, trying to give it all to my family and to my work. It is not about sucking it up. It is about giving EVERYTHING to somebody else. I work L&D with patients that are in pain, every single shift. I completely agree with this article. I sometimes just feel out of steam. Like there is a finite amount of compassion I have. I have come home from a 12 hour after being up for 24 hours to a surprise sick child who needed me, so I stayed up for 36 hours until my husband came home and was sick. When he came home I was all out. There are times when I just can’t anymore. Then I feel guilty and beat myself up. I look at nurses in their late 50’s limping, unable to lift things, and falling asleep if they sit down that are wore out but cannot retire yet. I see myself in 20 years. Nurses that beat themselves to give the best they can every single day, need a place to vent. To help them process everything, to get it out in a place that is safe. We do not get a place to vent at work. We do not sit and chit chat with our fellow nurses. We pride ourselves on giving continuously bedside care. Readers who feel like we need to suck it up can leave this page knowing that you will not ever understand until you have done it. And if you come into the hospital yourself sick or with a family member look at your nurse and think about that comment.
After living this life for 30 plus years and now educating others who’s future includes nursing I wonder why the hell we have teachers in our school district making over $80,000 a year, for a documented 185 days a year of work, no evenings or nights, no holidays, no required double shifts and summers off- complaining about their lots in life. We all choose our paths and it takes a strong individual to pursue the path of the most trusted profession in the world!!! Go nurses!!!!!!!
I’m a hospital pharmacist, so I can related to parts of what you posted (work hours, missing holidays, night shifts, etc), but I know that I don’t see half of what nurses see. Thank you for all you do and please do remember to take care of yourself as well!
It’s not just Nursing. Respiratory Therapists have similar issues, especially ones who work nights.
I agree, I see how busy the RTs are. They respond to every code, every new vent, etc. I always appreciate the help I receive from an RT. I often receive ventilated patients and appreciate it every time the RT is giving my patient a treatment, suctioning my patient, and checking on my patient. In many cases, other than other nurses, at night RTs are one of our most appreciated staff members who often lend us a hand when we do not have one. I had an RT the other day offer to help turn a patient, and that is beyond their job description where I work. Thank you for what you do.
Thank you for your blog. I felt guilty one day when I called into work but I was mentally drained. Of course I receive grief when I returned but I knew how much it was needed. I also felt guilty about being a nurse for only two years and already feeling this way. So again thank you for sharing your feelings.
I am 63 yrs old and have been a Mental Health Nurse for 34 yrs. I’m quite familiar with the long hours, shift work, weekends, holidays, last minute schedule changes and nurse/pt. ratio changes. I haven’t had a raise in six years. Although I have only worked in this hospital for under 12 yrs., I supposedly “capped out” that long ago. I earn $52-54k annually, depending on overtime. For the past few weeks I have scheduled a day off, using my PTO, in conjunction with my regularly scheduled one day off. My Clinical Mgr. recently told me I may not do so. That I must schedule my PTO for my vacation weeks only. I couldn’t even verbally respond at the time, I was rendered MUTE, as I was in such shock. It truly is incredible the demands placed on us as nurses. We, most of the time, just suck it up and move forward. At my age I dare say nothing, EVER. Ageism does exist. Makes no difference how quickly I move or how “at the top of my game” u am. . . say nothing! Thank you for the validation, thank you for a place to vent!!
Well said!
I have two nurses I’m in contact( more often than not )a week along with many more on Zara’s team that are a valuable contribution to her health…it’s due to their care that Zara is with us today. As you stated 24/7 bad weather , family issues , their own health issues , and spouses and children who can’t understand the rules of absence policies and how it effects bonuses not to mention others needed to cover your shift. I was a chemical shift worker that had to work the night my spouse asked for a divorce, only those who experience shift work and their partner truly get it . So if you feel neglected try to get educated about the hours and sacrifice others made to assist your needs, much admiration and gratitude to each and every one of these angels.
I retired after nearly 40 years in the healthcare field, yes I was and still am an RN, worked more holidays than I could ever count, missed many family gatherings, had my share of tears, but I was who I had always wanted to be, until I went into ADM and was DON, I found the new grads expected to have gravy in a profession that has NO gravy. Sadly they learned the hard way, i had to fire some for calling in on holidays knowing full well they were NOT sick.
This should be outlined in the very first week of training to become a nurse, one of the most difficult professions on Earth and one with the least amount of respect from the upper echelon. It isn’t done, because the schools need the money and don’t tell it like it is.
My hat goes off to those who remain and take it in stride. It is indeed a tough job, one loves it or hates it. That said if you’re not 100% happy, get out, before it gets you. JCF/RN
I want to thank you for this blog. I have worked 13 years as RN and I truly get why some of us get burnt out, depressed, and wanting to switch professions. Nursing has its challenges and I am grateful to see my fork in the road is to get more education to re- invent my career. The true joy I do get from nursing are the patients and their families I serve. I love helping new mothers hold their baby for the first time or teach them not to fear their small size, they will grow and thrive. 😉 I do wish more of us would develop strong solidarity especially as patient’s advocates but moreso not tolerate facilities that attempt to compromise safe health care for a monetary gain. Nursing requires a certain breed of males and females we continue to do what is right for the good of the patient and ourselves. There is a time when you must be honest with yourself that change is okay and you are willing to do so for the overall good. I love what I do and admire the the ones who have sacrifice and worked hard to wear the title, RN its an honor!!!!
I just read this and I have to say based on what I have seen this is totally true. I am currently a LMT working in a spa but for the past 9 years I was a pharmacy tech the last four in a hospital. All my friends were nurses they were my “customers” if you will. Their jobs seemed awful and when I went to school to change careers I specifically chose massage therapy over nursing to avoid the life nurses live. I’m proud of my nurse friends and their profession but I believe they deserve better treatment because how they are treated does effect patient care. Let me add no job in healthcare is easy and everybody gets overworked and underpaid in healthcare. We all need to have a lot more appreciation for each other and what each person does to make patient care possible. You can’t have a crash cart filled with drugs if a pharmacy tech didn’t put them in there and order them from the manufacturer. You can’t give a chemo treatment if a pharmacy tech didn’t mix the treatment for you in the hood. Those meds don’t stock themselves in Pyxis either. The pharmacist doesn’t do everything they used me like a cna and they never appreciated us. I’m so happy I got out!
WoW! You hit the nail on the head! I have always wanted to write down how I feel about nursing, but now I dont have to because you did an amazing job! Most people I know just don’t understand what we go through but I can have them read this blog for a little enlightenment now. Thank you
Nursing is a lot like teaching in some respects. Your hours are tougher. If I did not have the vacation breaks, I would never be a teacher. I need those breaks just like nurses need breaks too! I will remember to pray for the nurses I know!
I understand how you feel but I really dislike how you state that it’s just nurses. Respiratory therapist work their assess off just like you nurses do. We are in charge of the ventilators, intubate patients, run to codes, help in the ED and still assist patients on the floors yet we get treated as though all we do is give nebulizer treatments and we’re the red headed step children of the hospital. It’s not just nurses that have this issue but it’s a shortage in every department
Girl, you nailed it!. You just said what so many nurses are afraid to say. I have been a nurse for 20 years and I have grown to hate. They type of thing you are talking about goes on outside of hospitals and 12 hr shifts. We allow ourselves to be treated poorly. It is a sad thing and an awful profession. That being said, there have been amazing moments. Would I do it again for those moments? No. Thank you for what you wrote.
Loved the post. So true. However be careful not to make 12 hour shifts sound like the culprit. Big management push across the nation to eliminate them and make us work more days a week, with less days off. They say it’s a cost saving measure (of course). For nurses like us who work exactly how you described, it means more sick leave and mental health days… and the end of our profession as we know it. Only robots could work the way they expect us to now.
I agree that nursing is sometimes a “thankless” job, my daughter is a nurse and has the same feelings you do. Teachers have a thankless job too. I have been a substitute teacher and realized how taxing it can be just by the amount of paperwork the government piles on them only to be called lousy teachers because they have so little time to actually ‘teach’..I want you all to know I appreciate what you do and what you miss out on as well as the times you work with “cranky” families. Thanks for the blog…but I didn’t care for the F-bomb you dropped!
I constantly think thoughts of football players being paid millions, actors being paid millions… simply to entertain… and yet we are there at individuals weakest and are not even able to pee. Let alone eat lunch. I love nursing, medicine, science… but I am 8 years into health care and already looking for a way out. It is exhausting on your soul and there is still so much life to live and still help others!
Thank you for saying it like it is girl! We need to fight to make sure the nurse patient ratio does not get worse then what it already is. In doing so we fight for our patients and ourselves! Well said, loved every word 🙂
Thank you ! At I know it’s not only me 🙂 blessings
It never ceases to amaze me when I witness a lack of caring for our own. We give so much as nurses and if no one else cares for us,we should always support each other. God bless those tender hearts who go the extra mile for a sister or brother caregiver.
I applaud you for your honesty, but as a nurse, you should know it is your job to take charge of your mental health. If you aren’t provided with debriefing, GO GET IT. Somehow, some way. Or else you will always hate your job, and you will be the one who suffers for it.
You’re dead on sister!