The Effects of Nursing on Nurses
Hi, welcome to my blog post. I have never had a blog post get more than 50 comments, so I am a bit overwhelmed. After responding to many comments, here is a note:
Note: I wrote this blog entry at the end of my 3rd 12 hour shift in three days. I was tired and I was emotional. It is a blog post, not an “article.” It is not researched or sourced, it is purely opinion.
The point of this post is that nurses (and many other professions) need to take the time to practice self care and to encourage one another to practice self care.
My biggest mistake in this post (and there are many) was to use “her” or “she” when I should have used “they” or them.” I ignored my male coworkers, and I should not have. You have my apologies, and I have corrected the post. I have left “she” and “her” in place in the portion where I talk about my coworker.
I have read every comment posted and deleted some very nasty comments that were not helpful to conversation. If you feel this is the place to spew your vitriol, it is not.
August 11, 2013
This morning, while I was giving report to the day shift nurse taking over my patients, she burst into tears.
She’s going to miss her children’s hockey play offs due to our strictly enforced every other weekend schedules. You work every other weekend, no more, no less, unless you are going to college (I work every weekend because I’m in college). She’s their hockey coach, and inevitably, each year, their last game falls on a day their mother has to work. I’ve come in early for her before.
So I offered to come in on my night off for an hour and a half so she could get to the game. I’m coming in that early because I know she won’t be done charting.
She turned me down until another day RN got involved. I reminded my coworker I only live a mile from the hospital, and it really wasn’t a big sacrifice for me. She finally agreed, and calmed down. We got permission from the charge nurse.
Nursing is one of the largest professions in the world. If you don’t know a nurse, I’m really surprised. Nurses talk a lot about the rewards of nursing. Catching that vital sign, saving lives, providing comfort, but nurses, by nature, are taught to martyr themselves on the altar of nursing.
When I was a new grad, I hated coming to work so much that I would wish I’d get hit by a car on my way to work just to get out of work. One night, while checking medication sheets, I confessed this to some experienced nurses and found out some of them still felt the same way.
In nursing, it is NORMAL to have days where you wake up and just can’t mentally and emotionally face the day at work. I swear, the only other people who can understand this are nurses.
Nursing is emotionally, physically and mentally taxing, and some days you run too low on what you can give emotionally, physically and mentally. That minor back injury you don’t want to report to HR because you don’t want it on your record. Having a patient with constant diarrhea who can’t get out of bed and needs to be physically rolled and cleaned several times an hour. The cold you got from the two-year old someone brought in. The sorrow that comes from supporting someone who has just found out they were dying, holding in your own tears so you could wipe theirs. In one day, all of those patients could be yours.
I don’t know a nurse who hasn’t taken a mental health day. Some do it by requesting more vacation than others. Some do it by calling in sick, but it’s all time off because we are too drained to give anymore.
So if you know a nurse, and that nurse mentions to you that they feel like calling in because they just can’t take it another day, don’t give them a hard time. Especially if you have an 8-5 job with weekends off or some other really great schedule. The 12 hour shifts nurses work mean we miss the entire holiday we work with our families. Night shift nurses have to choose between holiday dinners or sleep. Often, if a nurse chooses to sleep rather than go to the holiday dinner, guilt ensues. Even though I’ve told my mother-in-law repeatedly that every nurse has to work holidays, she makes a point to say how horrible it is my husband has to be alone for a few hours. What about me? Working my ass off while everyone else celebrates?
We work hard. We are intentionally understaffed by our hospitals to improve profit, even if the hospital is a non-profit. We help people at the worst times of their lives, and often have no way to debrief, to get it off our chests. We don’t just bring warm blankets and pills. We are college educated, degreed professionals who are often treated like uneducated, lazy servants. We get sexually harassed by our patients. We get groped, punched, cut, I even know of a nurse on my floor being strangled (she survived).
Nursing can be rewarding. But nursing is a fucking hard job. If you are afraid of healthcare rationing, you should know it is already happening. Nurses are unable to give everyone the care they need, so patients with smaller problems may not get the same level of care. A nurse may be pressed to only give the minimum amount of care to a patient if they have 5 or more very sick patients. If you don’t want healthcare rationing, talk to your local hospitals about their nurse to patient ratios. Talk to your doctors. If you hear of legislation to support nurse to patient ratios, vote for it. Support it.
So if a nurse needs a day off, you support them. If you’re in a position to help like I was this morning, do so. If you are a nurse, go easier on yourself when you think about the things you didn’t finish, or the things you should have said. It’s a 24-hour a day job and you don’t have to do it alone.
As of January 27, 2014, this post is no longer accepting comments. I am doing this as a practice of self care. Tending to this blog post, several times a day, has become a burden. It has had over 2 million hits, and I am tired. The post has become a platform for people who want to propel their own agendas and are using my space to do so. Thanks to all who said such nice things, and to everyone else, go write your own blog.
Posted on August 11, 2013, in Nursing and tagged Health care, Nursing, registered nurse. Bookmark the permalink. 2,612 Comments.
ofcourseitsaboutyou 
I am not a nurse,but I do know nurses work bloody hard and these twelve hour shifts must be a killer, most shops and other works do an eight hour day,and I am sure half of them are glad to get home at night.so let’s support our nurses they do a wonderful job and they need some T.L.C. at times,where would we be without their care and attention,God bless them all,and to all nurses out there I wish you all a very happy and prosperous New Year.
Thanks Grim, many of my nursing friends have posted this blog entry on facebook. It’s true that many non-nurses have difficulty understanding a day in our shoes, just as I really have no idea what a day in the life of an insurance agent or office administrator entails.
You do three things well:
One: You’ve given non-nurses a glimpse into our world.
Two: you bring nurses together, not apart – we have a common identity in the joys and sorrows and struggles and triumphs of nursing – you reminded us all of that instead of focusing on the differences (day vs night, prn vs ft, icu vs floor, etc.)
Three: You write honestly, soulfully, vulnerably. Tolstoy is one of the greatest writers because he understands the human condition – and so do you.
Bravo and Thank you.
!!
Excellent blogpost. Ditto for respiratory therapists.
To all of those who day ‘if you don’t like it, leave’, guess what, I am. After 16 years of nursing I am taking my considerable skill and knowledge elsewhere, because quite frankly I am sick of being a physical and verbal punch bag. Sick of crying on the way home from work. Sick of working when I’m ill, sick of not being able to give the best care to my patient because what is best is ‘too expensive’, sick of being managed by people who see numbers not people. I loved my job, but in order to care for my family to the. Best of my ability, I need to look after my own physical and mental health.
Bravo Abs. That’s the most common sense approach to a solution that I have read.
I really appreciate all you nurses out there. I would have been sunk without you when I’ve had my hospitalizations. And I recognize your efforts and care that go into your profession and daily grind.
The thing that really breaks my heart is the mental, emotional and spiritual drain you expressed. You are so right, you have to give so much of yourself during your working hours. You also have to give so much after your working hours. They key is to feed yourself. If you don’t bring in and build yourself equally what you have to give out, you’ll run dry, run out and fall apart. Take the time to feed you. Not by going out with the girls (or guys) to get away and have fun. If your soul is hurt and run down, it needs refueling. There is no argument that your job requires a lot from you, but priority is to take care of you so you can take care of others. You chose an honorable profession that we all need and appreciate. But remember, hurting people hurt people. It may be the one in the bed that lashes out to you. And you realize it’s because they are hurting. But what happens when the nurse hurts? I’ve been on the other end of that. Good nurses who were pushed and tired, and who were hurting.
In this article, I hear a person who has pushed so hard that it hurts. Refuel, recharge, heal the mind and soul so you can be whole. Giving should be a joy, giving should be a purpose. It’s sad when it becomes a drudgery.
But I do take exception with this article. As with all professions, if you don’t like your job, find another. Yours pays well for a reason. It’s more taxing than what another may be. But you chose your profession for a reason, you schooled for it, got your degree because you believed it was worth it. What happened since you walked the aisle and received that degree? I would suggest that “real life” happened. If it’s still not worth it to you, then go back to school like the rest of us had to do and get a second degree. I know that sounds cold, and I’m not meaning it to be so. But that is the advice others who aren’t happy with their jobs are told.
Karen, I don’t see anywhere in Grimalkin’s commentary where she was saying, “I just can’t handle the nursing profession any more. Does anyone have any suggestions for me?”
Not every work related problem can be solved by quitting and moving on. Not everyone who’s having a work related problem CAN or WANTS TO quit and move on. And nowhere did Grimalkin even suggest that she’s thinking about quitting and moving on. Or, for that matter, that she’s looking for advice.
If you read what she’s written, without trying to read extra messages into it, all she’s doing is venting about several really bad shifts in a row. That’s what (emotionally healthy) people do when they’re stressed out—-they talk about it. And, more often than not, they’re just looking for someone to listen and validate their concerns. (In this case, she’s also encouraging nurses to work together toward solutions.)
I know it’s always tempting to come up with snap solutions for those who are frustrated beyond endurance, but I doubt she’s looking for snap solutions. And, if she were, chances are that she would already have figured out that one option would be to leave nursing, without having to have anyone point it out to her.
Olivia, that was a harsh attack on Karen. I’m sure she is intelligent enough with her education to have understood the blogger was venting. But more than nurses or medical professionals read this blog simply due to the fact that it has been offered up rolltide be spread around the web. And so it has. I saw the link to it on a friend’s facebook post and felt it must’ve been of some interest. When you open yourself up to the public, you will receive feedback from every direction. It’s not a place to attack the opinion or suggestions of others. Simply read the feedback and move on. Better yet, if you have a blogspot and need to vent, go open yourself up there and your comments and opinions can be vulnerable to the public. I believe the comments should be directed to the original blogger and not the opinions of those who have been allowed by the blogger to be printed here.
K, challenging someone on their opinion isn’t “attacking.” In my opinion, far too many posters here—usually nonnurses—are giving snap solutions, mostly “Just quit if you’re unhappy,” that solve nothing, and don’t really address the issue.
Nursing is a team effort, you know, and I think the nurse who wrote this piece needs and deserves support from those who understand what she’s talking about. So I’ll continue to speak up. Sorry if you don’t approve.
I gave nursing away only after 10 years hard labour. Pursuing it with mighty ambition as a mature age student with 2 children, a job, husband and university how did I do it nurses just “DO IT” to be in the operating theatre and just one more patient on the list to have an appendix out or fracture pinned. These little ops take hours of office work before hand organizing the staff to stay the surgeon has a team of at least 12/16 in order to get just that little op done!!!
Now I’m a teacher 3rd career change, then on a bus in Cambodia a serious accident there screams of pain I heard,I knew them so well, I watched someone speak to her friend then grab her bag to go and help.
Hang on reality check here I’m a nurse too so together with nothing only my knowledge of the Khmer language we soon had ice, blankets and an ambulance on the way. Stabilized and in the mud on the side of the road, both of us not speaking the same language administering assistance. Once canulated and we took all the gauze possible an IV fluids with a big fight from the ambulance first aid kit. It was really as precious as Angkor Wat and would of been so hard for them to have it in there old/broken down ambulance. Those supplies were there for what the next person might need, we had a seriously injured patient so we took/stole them and transferred her to 2 hospitals before we actually got a PAT slide or neck collar.
No such thing in Cambodia. She survived and her family were eternally greatful and couldn’t thank us enough. Just all in a days work. I donated a Pat slide to the small little hospital and showed them how to use it, simply amazed the staff 🙂 so hopefully more will become just normal hospital equipment who Knows?????
I am not a nurse but have often thought about this but just wanted to say thank you. It should be illegal in this country to be forced to work more than an 8 hour shift. People need their free time and personal space. Someone needs to introduce this to congress
Scott…you’re kidding right? Are you some kind of liberal Kool-Aid drinking Communist? No one is forcing Nurses to work an 8 hour shift. We actually apply for and are interview for positions and accept the terms of the position before we start. Besides, I like working 3 twelve hour shifts instead of 5 eight hour shifts. Next time do not comment on things you do not have any background on. K-Thanks.
I can’t tell you how how discouraging it is to hear nurses complain about how unhappy they are about their jobs. If you are unsatisfied with something in your life, you have options: change it or accept it. (Complaining is also an option but a self-defeating one, as nothing is truly accomplished except the spreading of misery.)
Stress is married to nursing and you can’t separate the two, but that doesn’t mean there’s nothing to improve upon. There are pathways to changing how things are done in hospitals – sometimes it’s just a matter of speaking up. But more often than not we only feel the changes come from the top down, from new legislation, TJC, or “the bottom line.” If you work for a hospital or company that truly values it’s employees, there IS a way for your voice to be heard. You won’t be able spontaneously change nurse-to-patient ratios overnight but you might be able to improve upon other aspects of the job to make the work more tolerable. (Personally, I don’t think nurse-to-patient ratios will change until the public recognize our struggle: “Maybe my confused 88-year-old grandmother ISN’T getting the best care possible because her nurse has 5 other sick/demanding/worried/confused patients and families to deal with…”)
Realistically the changes and acceptance a nurse makes about his or her life is usually done on a much more personal level. For me, I could accept working holidays by justifying to myself that people get sick 365 days of the year. I could accept the fact that some patients and family members are rude or mean or just downright noncompliant. I could even accept the fact that not all patients survive. What I couldn’t accept was the anxiety that came with nursing. I dreaded starting day one of a three or four day (or night) stretch, wondering that if, in a mad panic to help all my patients, I’d miss something. I became increasingly nervous about the patients that were unfairly assigned to me – patients on balloon pumps or CRRT – before I had proper training. At first I tried to be proactive to combat the anxiety. I switch my schedule from nights to days to improve my sleep and mood. I took all the training classes offered so that I could handle fresh hearts, IABPs, and critically ill patients. I even got involved in our unit council meetings. But for me, the anxiety never really went away so I had to make to make a choice: accept it or change it.
I made the decision to leave nursing full-time 3 years ago because I was not happy with the way I was feeling all the time. I now work a full-time job Monday-Friday and only nurse PRN. I feel like my life has made a 180-degree turn for the better. Sure, I work a lot and I still get anxious at the start of a shift, but I can accept both of those things because it’s no longer overwhelming. My life is more balanced and I’m much happier. 🙂
Healthcare advocates are needed at all levels, not just at the bedside. If you love helping people, start with yourself. Don’t be afraid to make a change! Life is way to short to be miserable all the time, and too much stress will put your right in that hospital bed (and we all know what that looks like).
I agree with Megan on the petition to improve our nurse patient ratios. To include long term care. While a lot of nurses (who have never worked ltc) believe believe nurses who work im geriatrics have it “easy” this job can be a daily hardship as well. We all know nursing is taxing on our personal health and you just have to find a way to make that work in your own life/situation. I am a person that will take anothers entire shift and come in early. I usually see when you give forward you also recieve some sort of generosity back. We just need to take care of our fellow nurses and we can survive. As far as the holidays go, it is no secrete nurses are at the bottom of the pole when it comes to recieving recognition.Remember we are here because we care. When i say nurses I am referring to anything from a cna to an rn. Remember to give respect to any member of your team, including housekeeping. They make your job easier too. Cnas bust their behinds and are truely dedicated and caring people so remember to give them a thank you bc they also make your job way easier. Lets get that petition going for ratios!
Loved the post, great thoughts! I don’t think mist of us on the outside see or realize the love and sacrifice nurses make on a daily basis and have done so for centuries.
I am 50 years old I need a career change and was debating starting my pre reqs and going into nursing. I think I will look for something else to do. Thank you to all nurses and CNA’s for your hard work. I truly appreciate it. Bless you.
Nursing has many different areas that you can work. This nurse works in a acute care hospital. There are so many options. Home-health, research, clinics, speciality areas etc. You need more input than this to decide about nursing or not.
No, please do not change your mind about nursing. It is a rewarding job..just sometimes it can be overwhelming. I .believe this post is more about supporting your fellow co-worker.
I understand all you have posted about. I have been a nurse (LPN) for 30 years and it has taken a physical and emotional toll on me. Currently I am not working as I was ordered by my MD not to work night shifts as it makes me physically ill but try finding a job on days. A lot of places are now requiring every nurse be an RN. I remember going into nursing not so that I would always have a job but because it was a profession where you could care and help people. It was at the time a compassionate field now its just a business, its all about the bottom line. You don’t even get 2 seconds to speak with your patients and address their concerns. Over the years I have missed alot of functions with my children, when they were in school. My children are all grown now with children of their own. I remember going to work and not having a break to eat or go to the bathroom. If you did leave the floor for a minute you were getting paged to come back because someone needed you for something. I had a patients family member tell me once that she didn’t know how we did what we do and that she could never do it and that we as nurses didn’t get paid enough. She also said it was a thankless job. I’ve seen nursing at it best and at its worse, I hope someday soon everything will be re-evaluated, such as. length of shifts, pays and the amount of sacrifices that nurses and doctors make in their lives.
I worked as a LPN for 12 years (starting in 1982) then returned to college for my Associates Degree because I was a single parent and had to provide for my son. Nursing is from the CNA’s, LPN’s, and RN’s. Now they are pushing for BSN. I will not be going back to school for it. The hospital I worked at phased out the LPN’s whom were greatly needed to function as a team. We (RN’s) did not take a pay raise for one year because “administration” said if we did not take the yearly pay raise..it would save the CNA’s and LPN’s jobs. In my opinion, we were lied to because that is exactly what they did.. was eliminate the LPN’s and some of the CNA’s.
Olivia – you put it very well. It is a damn hard job and nurses should be able to vent whenever and wherever it is needed. Would it be too much to ask to give the poor souls a room to go to or an on-staff therapist to see. I watch my daughter and it breaks my heart – she is so dedicated works so hard – I had no idea what she has gotten into and I wish I had not encouraged her. You few others that say stop complaining – get a grip on reality and shut the hell up.
Thank you
I guess the one positive that came out of working in a hospital for 15 years and experiencing all of the pain of missing important life events was that when I finally changed my track and went into senior nursing care into management I became the nicest boss ever. My staff know that all they have to do is tell me that something important in their life has come up from their child’s first day of kindergarten to the soccer game their kid gets to be the goalie in and I will make sure they get it off, even if I work the floor. Nursing breaks some people and makes other people even more compassionate than they already were. I hope those of you who stick it out and eventually end up in management treat it the same way I do-a payback to the nursing professionals who have paid dues. I want to keep people in nursing and the only way to do that is treat them like human beings who matter.
I want to work for you!!! LOL! Good for you!
If only Long Term care had more Admin. like you!!
Wow… bless you Ande. Too many nurse managers forget where they came from.
I feel sorry for the above comments about the poor hospital that needs to make a profit. It has become business, instead of patient care. The problem is the hospitals have become money making corporations that have no regard for there staff, doctors included. The medical professionals work there tails off to provide excellent care and all we get in return is, how much more can we do in a shorter time and still produce the same result and make sure we leave on time. There shall be no overtime, because we do not want problems with productivity. I have been a nurse for many years, seen many changes, some good, some bad, but the medical profession right now is in bad shape. The nurses are overworked, stressed to the limit and working short staffed daily. So give us a break and quit feeling sorry for the hospitals Evelyn and Dave
YAY Judy! You nailed it! I am so tired of the hospitals IMPLYING they will have to close their doors if nurses don’t take unsafe patient loads and techs work like slaves. In the meantime they are busy having their millions of meetings with tons of staff who do – who knows what? There is a whole section of hospital middle management that could be axed and I doubt anyone would notice. Well, we might not have some of the annoying and petty paperwork chores anymore. The ones that keep us from the bedside. I love how they quote “best practice: when it works for the hospital interests, but totally ignore best practice when it involves nurse/tech/patient ratios.
Amen, Ann Huff Townsend. Also, how about those hospitals that keep building bigger, more beautiful campuses with valet parking, concierges, ice cream parlors and fancy gardens, but “can’t afford” to staff their nursing units properly?
Agreed!
Amazing. I literally could not have said this better. Very true. This is one of the reasons I became an NP. Being an NP is still very hard and rewarding, but in a completely different way. Shift work can be brutal.
I don’t typically leave comments on blog posts or anything like this, but I had to this time. My father has worked in hospitals for more years than I can count. It’s been a few years ago now, he was working and he passed a nurse he knew on one of the floors. She took one look at him, made him sit down and she took his blood pressure. It was frighteningly high. She would NOT let him go back to work. She called a doctor she knew and got him in to see the doctor right then. Prior to this, my father did not go to the doctor. He was working himself into an early grave. I really feel this nurse saved his life that day. In addition, because of his new relationship with a doctor’s office, he started going for other issues and his cancer was discovered. Again, indirectly, she saved his life. If she had not insisted he go to the doctor and not back to work, he may have had a heart attack or the cancer may have gotten worse. This nurse is my hero.
Without trying to sound like a dick, what are you complaining about? I have worked both as a nurse, and as a paramedic. Nurses have steady hours, good pay, and work in an enclosed environment. Do we have hard days? Well, yes. Is it difficult to work with 4-5 pts at a time? Yup.
Fact is, I have found nothing in nursing that remotely resembles the stress I endured while working as a paramedic.
As a nurse, I can raise the bed to a comfortable height to protect my back. If I need help moving a patient, I can find it.
I work inside where there is heat in the winter, and cool in the summer…most of the time. I am out of the rain and don’t have to sit in a wet uniform for 12 hours.
I don’t have to get a second or third job just to make ends meet ($21.50/hr as a nurse vs. $9.00/hr as a medic).
If a patient falls victim to cardiac arrest, there is a code team. I don’t have to be the one to tell the eight family members standing around watching “I’m sorry, I couldn’t save him/her”.
I don’t have to try to start an IV shivering with numb fingers. I don’t have to belly crawl through snow, ice, and slush to get to my patients.
I generally don’t have to worry about whether or not a patient has a weapon and intends on using it on me. I don’t have to wear a ballistic vest.
I don’t have to obtain 45 CEUs to renew my license.
The only real hazards I have found in nursing are other nurses. Now I’m sure there are those of you that are reading this and uttering hateful comments through gritted teeth, but the fact of the matter is nursing is a great job. Good pay, benefits, room for advancement. If the specialty I am in becomes unbearable, I get find a new specialty. I don’t have to stay where I am. There is a worldwide nursing shortage. I don’t even have to stay in the States if I don’t want to.
We all have bad days and need to vent. Venting is healthy, so by all means vent, but try to keep things in perspective. Your job ain’t that bad. If you are that unhappy, leave. No one forced you to be a nurse. Job isn’t what you expected? Pull up your big girl panties, most jobs aren’t. Don’t bring your negative energy to your patients and coworkers.
With all due respect, Brian, who are you to tell a total stranger that her job “ain’t that bad”?
What makes you so sure that you know better than she does what she experiences every day when she walks onto that unit and clocks in?
If you weren’t sleeping through your nursing school lectures on therapeutic communication, you know that dismissing or belittling someone else’s heartfelt complaints is of NO use to anyone (except, perhaps, to your own ego). Are you familiar with that currently trendy slogan “Pain is whatever the patient says it is”? Well, that’s true of EMOTIONAL pain, too, whether or not it’s a patient experiencing it. The quickest way to destroy a line of communication is to pooh-pooh the other person’s instincts, and to assume (out loud) that you know better.
So why not give your snap judgments and ego a rest for a bit, and just hear what she’s saying, and empathize with her?
Because this is about her and HER feelings. Not about you and your employment credentials.
That’s cute Olivia.
It’s not meant to be “cute,” Brian. It’s meant to give you a reality check.
Whose reality, yours? I don’t need a reality check dear. I’ve been exposed to healthy doses of reality for the past twenty years. If you go back and re-read my previous post you may be able to see that it was not a personal attack on the author. I did not address her directly. My post was to all nurses. Your posts sound angry. Would you like to talk about it? See there, I wasn’t sleeping during my therapeutic communication lecture. You were very quick to attack me personally regarding my post. Perhaps you are one of the nurses I was referring to. Maybe time to get out?
No, Brian, I didn’t “attack (you) personally.” Why, I didn’t even try to belittle you by calling you “dear,” or saying your comment was “cute.” I simply pointed out that lecturing someone who’s just asking to be heard isn’t very useful OR therapeutic.
Clear now? I hope so.
AMEN!! 🙂
Wow Brian, you DO sound like a dick. If you don’t like what she has to say, don’t read her blog. She isn’t suggesting that SHE has it so much harder than everyone else, but knowing many nurses myself, many hospitals are far understaffed and it falls on the nurses shoulders to care for more patients than they normally should. Some hospitals do not even have CNA’s to assist, so having 5 patients is difficult. Good for you for “sucking it up,” maybe you’re just better than the rest of us.
Brian where do you work? 4 or 5 pts? I get up to 4 at the the icu here , 8 tele and 10 med surg. If being a medic was so bad why do it? Why don’t you put some panties on?
Okay, FNP to be, I just about fell off my chair at your comment here. :>D
You need to leave the hospital where you currently work if you are up to 4 patients in the ICU.
Brian proves that nurses are nasty and don’t care about each other. There are fewer physicians than nurses and yet they control health care. Reason: they stick together. And I would never work for $21.00/hr, what an insult. If it is less than $40, you are underpaid. Brian needs to shut up and get some experience. He really sounds like a fool and I would hate to work with him.
Oh Brian… I hear what you are saying. I worked as an RN in the ER for years, and I have always had the utmost respect for EMS. EMS works in VERY rough conditions without question for pay under what fast food employees make, without a lot of public respect or gratitude (i.e. “are you the ambulance driver?” or essentially believing the ambulance is their personal chaffeur). I get that. And I will wholeheartedly agree with you that we (as nurses) ARE able to work in climate-controlled environments, have amazing career flexibility and are able to advance. I love being a nurse and wouldn’t want to do anything else – it’s who I am. Having said that, the original post absolutely resonates with me. I give my all for my patients whenever I work (and now that I am in leadership/mgmt., they are ALL mine and so are all of the staff! a much bigger load!). Please do not be quick to judge those who have these struggles. While in EMS you see horrible things, have a chaotic environment, and are severely underpaid, nurses must deal with 12+ hours (commonly) of cares. Many times to the same patients (vs. pick up/ drop off). For days on end. We develop a relationship with the patients that I believe really only occurs due to the time we spend with them… (not that EMS doesn’t want to, they just can’t – and for the few that you do, it’s because they are frequent flyers – not good). In EMS you can only go to a call at a time – as a nurse the patients can just keep on coming unless you are unionized (which is rare). They are two very different points of care – both essential and deserving of respect – but different nonetheless. Even though for you the one is easier than the other, that doesn’t mean that is everyone’s truth or experience. For example, in my area, LEO will always accompany EMS in potentially dangerous situations but in the ER, we were mostly on our own – I was constantly frightened by what was likely to happen.
I could be off-base, but you sound very practical to me. Most people that go into nursing (anecdotally) do not go into it because it’s a practical job but because they just want to take care of people and help heal them. THAT is where the severe stress comes from. Investing yourself in your patients this way is exhausting, the physical conditions are pretty difficult at times (who else doesn’t go on pee breaks??), can be dangerous, and is difficult in the very volatile environment of healthcare. I do not mean this that I believe you are uncaring, I am just trying to share this perspective.
I encourage everyone participating in these responses to show the kindness and empathy to one another as the original blog writer showed all of us. We can choose to disagree (if we do) with respect, not disgust.
I’m going to agree with Brian here …
“We all have bad days and need to vent. Venting is healthy, so by all means vent, but try to keep things in perspective… If you are that unhappy, leave. No one forced you to be a nurse. Job isn’t what you expected? Pull up … most jobs aren’t. Don’t bring your negative energy to your patients and coworkers ”
……..
Yes, we all have bad days, if you’re unhappy, make a change – change your livelihood, or work to change staffing and/or ratios …. Venting is natural and acceptable, just put it in perspective and please leave the negative energy (and your personal baggage) at the entry door, feel free to pick it up when your shift is over….
KUDOS to Ande …. that’s my kind of attitude
Brian,
I didn’t bring any negativity to my patients and my coworkers. I channeled my frustration and anger into action to assist my coworker and then I wrote a blog entry about my frustrations. Because I use writing to deal with frustrations when I am outside of work, I do not bring these frustrations INTO work. This is a HEALTHY COPING MECHANISM. You remember coping mechanisms from nursing school, RIGHT? This is a blog. It’s my blog. If you don’t like it, LEAVE.
I never said anything about paramedics or other medical practitioners because I was relating my experience, THAT DAY, as a nurse. I never said nursing was easier than EMS. They are different professions and frankly, dealing with overbearing, all knowing attitudes from paramedics is a challenge at times. There are good paramedics and then there are paramedics who are frustrating to deal with. There are good nurses to work with and nurses I’d never want to talk to.
Telling someone to “pull up their big girl panties” is incredibly sexist. I never would tell a male nurse complaining about a rough day to “pull up his drawers.” You’re implying that I’m a childish, immature person, and I’m not.
If all the nurses who dread bad days at work quit nursing, we would have an even greater nursing shortage than we currently do.
My post was a call to nurses to look out for each other and to practice self care. It was a way to deal with frustration in a healthy manner that didn’t affect my patients. I really hope I don’t have to work with many nurses who feel that being stressed because of the job means they should completely leave the job.
I’m an LPN in a rehab facility, on a regular shift when we have no empty beds , I have 22 patients. I am able to pass medications, do treatments and done very poot noting. My patients suffer because I am unable to provide the care they deserve. I often work doubles, and feel under appreciated as I’m sure many of you do.
I love being a nurse and am grateful to have a job.
There are many jobs or professions that go through the same things, like firefighters and police, ministers, Doctors, there are adult children taking care of a parent a parent taking care of a special needs child, like me. Foster and adopted parents of kids with and without special needs kids, like me. I get tired of feeling like I can’t vent, tired of feeling like I have to be the strongest, mostly I get tired of hearing that I “choose my life” and tired of hearing “you knew what you were getting yourself into”. But you know it is not just the helping profession that struggles like this. I have been at restaurants and watched people be rude to their waitress, treating her less than. I have seen the impatient shopping taking it out on the cashier when they waited for longer than they wanted to. I have seen trash men pick up garbage as the bags broke and lift very heavy things, I have seen 50 year old women scream at a 16 year old fast food worker because her order was wrong, we all have heard of teachers assaulted. Life is tough and no one is more untitled than another to have understanding acceptance and kindness. We need each other so let’s support each other. Say Thank you and smile everyday, pay it forward. That emotional support goes a long way.
wow. Hope you are nicer to you patients than you are to your fellow nurses. And have fun working alone when all the other nurses get fed up and leave. I bet you’ll be busy.
How was she rude to her fellow coworkers? She sacrificed her time off to help a coworker find the time to watch her child play a final hockey game. Sounds pretty selfless to me!
I am not a nurse, but am a Veterinary Technician, so a lot of this goes hand in hand. It is very well said! They should allow so many mental helth days a year instead of having to use sick time.
This is off topic a bit, but, Samantha, I have to admire you vet techs. I work with human patients, and that can be rough, but I’d have a terribly hard time coping with sickness and misery in animals, who can’t speak up about what’s hurting them or how to fix it.
I’ll take four sick humans over one sick kitty any day. In most cases, anyway……..
The Nursing Profession is not easy by any means, it requires sacrifices from each and everyone of us. Covering for each other is one of the most important sacrifices we make. It doesn’t matter where you work, how long the shift or the day of the week. If some on the team is struggling and you are in a position to take some of the pressure off that team member you do it. If that means answering a light, giving a PRN pain med. or even taking an admission, you do what is necessary to support the team.
Please notice, I refer to the team. This team includes Nurses, Techs, or anyone else assigned to your shift. In this day and age of increasing acuity and ever present staffing issues we have to work as a team to give each and every patient the care the deserve. That is our profession, it’s what we do.
This is so true not just for our nurses RN LPN but for us CNA PCTS PCA’S you just posted a day I just had yesterday.
No one eles besides us in the nursing profession will truly understand.
I look forward to what eles will be blogged.
God Bless ALL us in the profession of nursing!!
I completely agree with you! I remember early in my nursing career having a panic attack an hour before my shift started. I ended up lying on the floor in my kitchen sobbing and struggling to catch my breath because I was so terrified to go to work. After 6 years of working on the same unit, with a year of per diem, I finally had to change units because the surgical floor was too difficult for my mind, body, and soul. Hang in there, remember the awesome work you’re doing to help change and save lives. Revel in the success, grieve in the sadness, but be proud of yourself for picking a profession that is so demanding and rewarding! We need all the nurses we can get!
This is so well written!, I am a psychiatric nurse, I work in the Emergency Room with one other nurse during my shift. We do not have a psychiatrist in house, or even a nursing assistant, so we do all of the assessments, answer the phone, call the psychiatrist, handle every crisis, chase patients down the hall when they try to elope, input everything into the computer, (including the medication orders) after we have called the psychiatrist. Most of all we listen, and listen, and listen…as many as 12 psych. patients come through that ER in an eight hour shift, and often they are there all at the same time. A VERY big patient load for just two nurses.
I spend a lot of money and time on therapy, massage, exercise and paying attention to my diet, and, yes, I use my vacation and sick time when I need to and I don’t feel bad about it.
I have watched to many nurses ruin their health being martyr’s. It breaks my heart when I meet them, they suffer from addictions and emotional breakdowns.
I call to all nurses, TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF FIRST!
write your congressmen/women! Remind them that we might be taking care of them, or one of they’re famiy member’s one day.
It is really sad that nurses come into a profession, in most cases they do this because they are caring people. The hospitals themselves are over priced, money making machines, administrators making huge dollars, to “make a profit”. Mean while the patient suffers, the nurses suffer. Fortunately I have not been admitted to a hospital in a while (hope it stays that way), but I have visited. Anybody who thinks nurses just sit behind a desk and go to patients when the bell rings are delusional. I rarely have seen where a nurse is not working or caring for a patient. The nurses don’t have enough time to work their load of patients, resulting in less care, patients becoming irritable, resulting in both nurses and patients being irritable.
Doctors come visit (3 – 5 minutes), mainly just to do a visit to charge for a visit. Don’t really tell you anything – the nurse has to read what the doctors say and explain to the patient. I am not a nurse or does anybody in my family work as a nurse or LPN. I just stand up to those nurses (most of which are truly nice people) who are over tasked, but truly do try to do what the can to make a patient comfortable.
Happy New Year to all the nurses wherever you work. I hope you find peace that you truly deserve.
God bless all of you nurses! You are angels and advocates for your patients. Thank you!!
All I can say is God bless you all. My sister was had cancer and had it not been for dedicated nurses, her final hours would have been hell. You are angels among us and I thank you from the bottom of my heart. Namaste ❤
Well done that’s so freakly accurate about our profession!
As a nurse of 20+ years you are correct!!!
That blog was exactly what I needed to hear this morning, especially after the shitty shifts ive been experiencing lately. We nurses are martyrs. Suffering bladder infection, hurting bodies and no breaks to eat ir even catch our breath more than I want to admit. It takes special peopke to be nurses. It is true that is is a largely no thanks profession and we are treated as glorified slaves most of the time. After 7 years as a nurse my husband still cant understand why I cant just get off on time. Our jobs are with human beings and their health, we have to finish. You cant leave life and death facts or problems to thewind and hope the turn out ok or that your fellow nurse will figure it out. Im glad someone else is feelimg this way as well, it validates my frustrations. I needed that:) thanks to my fellow professionals, we aremaking livesbetter one by one, even if no one is noticing!!!
Thank you for posting. I have been in this profession for decades. I LOVE caring for patients and their families. I do like 12 hour shifts b/c I can have more time off to spend with family & friends. I DO agree with the feelings of missing family time. I’ve missed too many events with my family over the years.
But this really isn’t the issue here. We ARE pawns in a game. We need to be appreciate by those RN’s in management who have climbed their way to higher ranks and have forgotten what it is like on the playing field, in the trenches. THEY need to be our voice in:
–reducing patient ratios
–making sure there are “float” nurses so we get our lunches, breaks and address bathroom needs
–maintaining a workplace free from violence, discrimination & sexual harassment
–fighting to get the staff appropriate vacation time to care for themselves
–appearing in the floor unannounced with refreshments for the staff
–lending a helping hand when everything is in “crisis mode”
–buying pizza or sandwiches for staff when no one gets a lunch
–working to let the entire staff know that “the buck stops here, and I appreciate everything you are doing for the patients. I am on your side”.
And John Q Public needs to recognize what medical personnel do!! Not just say “they do a great job”. Show you care!! Did you know:
–there were low interest home mortgages just for firefighters, police and teachers??? And prior military have theirs!!!! WHAT ABOUT NURSES????
–cheap cruise fares for firefighters, police, teachers, prior military???? WHAT ABOUT NURSES????
–discounts on new cars for firefighters, police, teachers, prior military service!!! WHAT ABOUT NURSES????
These are just a few examples!! Can you see why nurses feel so unappreciated?? We do receive thank you & hugs from patients & families, but that does NOT pay the bills (low wages), or help us to relax on a nice vacation (low wages), or relax in a home of our own (low wages)!!! What is there out there to show us we are appreciated????
And any comments otherwise tells us that you are NOT in our profession or you are a new nurse or nursing student who has not gotten the iron door of reality shut in your face!!
NURSES!!! IT’S TIME WE ALL STAND UP FOR OURSELVES & LET EVERYONE KNOW WE DESERVE MORE!!!!! (PS, I’m NOT burnt out!!! Just UNDERAPPRECIATED!!!!)
This is a great post! Kudos to you! The only thing I have to add after reading some of these replies. “IF YOU ARE NOT A NURSE, OR A CARING FAMILY MEMBER OF A NURSE, I CAN ASSURE YOU THAT YOU “””DON’T””” UNDERSTAND”!!!!!
I never comment on anything, but I have to give you a virtual *hug*. I’m a relatively new grad RN (2.5 years) Ive been working on a LTC unit while going to school to be an NP. Let me say this, I love nursing, I love what I do. I couldnt imagine doing anything other than nursing, ever, and I have never regretted my career choices. That being said, I have been punched, kicked, spit on, bitten, berated (by patients). Granted, they have dementia of varying degrees and are very elderly.. so I take the hazards of the job with a smile. The staffing issue, though… I could speak on that. I have 17-21 patients on my census, with two aides. The patients are FULLLLLL CARE. I cant stress this enough. The fall risks, I cant even…The detriment to patient care understaffing causes makes me so angry. When patients’ family members complain, I’M the one apologizing, and telling them.. ” I couldn’t agree with you more that we need more staff”. Many of them have expressed to me in private that they feel sorry for how hard I have to work. I have little to no support from my managers/administrator, I have no voice whatsoever. Its very disheartening. The bottom line: Im a young, healthy nurse, a little blood, sweat and tears never hurt anyone… but when it comes to patient safety, and the safety of my license, I find the status quo unacceptable. THAT is why I find it hard to sleep at night, and face the next work day.
Also, high five to you for being an awesome co-worker and supporting your fellow nurse. I wish more nurses thought like you.
cops know what this is like..telling the family their 9 year old son is dead. a man who shot himself in the head and seeing his brains splattered against the wall….
Only difference ppl love nurses but because they pull someone over for speeding cuz they’ve seen kids die from it, ppl hate cops.
A great post. Thanks.
…and when you ask about nurse/patient ratios, be sure to clarify that you mean clinical (hands-on) nurses. Some organizations fudge that statistic by including administrators, executives etc. I don’t mean to downplay their importance but when you are a patient and you need someone to bring your meds or assess the changes in your condition the CNO is not a help!
Your post was right on the money. I’ve been a nurse for 20 years, and I’ve experienced everything you described in your blog. Nursing is a very hard, and sometimes thankless, job. And you’re right, the only ones who really understand that is other nurses.
I’m a retired Clinical Lab Scientist, Medical Lab Supervisor, dedicated to my profession for 46 years. With absolutely no disrespect to Nurses I believe that Laboratory professionals working in Hospital and Clinical settings can also relate to all the effects on our personal lives by working in the Medical field. We as Laboratory people are usually in the background and are not recognized as Nurses but we are there for guality care for the patient also. We have to learn when we are away from work to make our family time top priority and thank God for every precious minute. Thank you to all our dedicated medical professionals.
While I do agree with most of this blog I have to take exception at the idea of a nurse calling in sick for a “mental health day” being acceptable. Yes, we as nurses often get burnt out and have little or nothing more to give but if when we call in sick someone else has to take our place. That means the floor runs short, which further stresses the nurses working that shift, or someone has to come in on THEIR day off to cover us. Nurses do have to take care of themselves but we also have to take care of, and respect each other.
Amen
Nurses who are suffering from compassion fatigue make more medical errors and have higher rates of infections and falls than nurses who are not suffering from compassion fatigue. The treatment for compassion fatigue, which I feel affects a disproportionate number of healthcare workers, is time away from work. I’m not saying call in every week, but if you literally cannot face your work day without a panic attack or bursting into hysterics, it might be better for the floor to find someone to cover your position while you look after your own needs.
Please forgive me, but I must disagree with you, but on one item only. One does not have to be a nurse to understand. I’m a respiratory therapist, and I totally get everything else. I’m no longer working in a hospital because of the intentional understaffing and the impossible task of trying to give every patient the care they need and deserve without enough help to do just that. I am married to a nurse. When we did work together, the stress of our jobs followed us home. The only solution that I could see was for one of us to leave that environment. (He does dialysis, and I worked in a surgical ICU – CABG’s, AAA’s, etc.) Self care to the extreme, and it definitely made a difference for us. …still don’t like being called a nurse or being under-appreciated by nurses, though. I now teach CPR, etc. for a living, and I make certain the nurses in my classes know how to appreciate their RT’s.
“Intentional understaffing” perfectly sums up one of the biggest issues I have with healthcare. Is the lay person generally aware that this goes on (and is increasing in popularity)?? I work PRN in a flex/float position for two large nonprofit city hospital. I see this same problem on every floor, at every level. My last shift was in MSICU and nurses were asked to “triple up.” Two RTs were managing vents and BIPAPS for 24 patients! The charge nurse had two ICU patients of her own, and the two techs on the floor were also acting as sitters because the ADON “could not find” more regular sitters. To know we are constantly INTENTIONALLY understaff is heartbreaking. The complaint is not, “Wow, my job is tough.” The complaint is, “Wow, this is really unsafe.”
Well said!
I am a new grad nurse and find myself feeling this way, too. When I hit my third of fourth 12-hour shift in a row, I struggle to find the emotional and mental drive to be the best I can be. I absolutely love nursing and could not imagine doing anything else, but it definitely is one of the hardest things I have done.
Spot on. I have felt this way many times. I know of no other profession (except maybe law enforcement) that has as little respect as the nursing profession. I have been a nurse for over 40 years, my basic education is a BSN. Our salaries are very low on the scale compared to others wilh similar education (my husband was a Pharmacist with a basic BS in pharmacy and has always made twice what I make). Mechanics make more than we do. Plummers make more than we do. And the list goes on. I am currently retired but work PRN in hospice. One of the worst ideas hospitals had was the 12 hour shifts (this helps prevent paying overtime). I can identify with the overworked, back aching, head reeling feelings mentioned in the blog. I can identify with missing milestones in my childrens lives due to rigid scheduloing. When my husband was almost killed in an accident several years ago, I was written up for and denied a raise for calling our too many days. Administration expects us to be compassionate, how about them? And yes, I have also been a member of administration.
I agree that nurses need to take care of ourselves, we need to be able to vent, we have rights (same as the patients) and we need to be aware of them and have Administrators/management at all levels who will listen to us and back us up.
this just reminded me of those days when I was a nurse in hospitals, I can’t agreed more. Sadly nurses don’t look after themselves and each other, but some nurses unable to treat nurse colleagues in the same way as they treat their patients. strange enough!!
After sacrificing time with my kids and lots of money to get my nursing degree, this is exactly why I left floor nursing. One night I had 8 patients, 5 of them on bed alarms, no aide, and was raked over the coals for daring to call the doctor while he was sleeping. It was the defining moment when I decided I had more self-respect than to be treated that way. Now I work in the research industry making almost triple the salary than I did as a floor nurse. Sad testimony to the under-valued and under-appreciated profession.
To read this article.Takes my breath away. I am a Licensed Practical nurse,22 years experience. I have worked the range of private practice, jail setting, with the majority of my career in the geriatric long term health care setting.(the old fashioned kind) Relentless hours and circumstances, Thorough my years I have developed a mixed feelings about my career, as nurse due the things noted in the above articles. In 2012 I left my home of 25 years South east coast, and moved too the foot hills of the mountain area. Here i am having the worst time finding employment as LPN. This has caused me to go back to school with the hopes of training in a different type of health care field. I am looking forward to Not holding my bladder, Not being the venting board for a UN happy family member, not being hit on by a up set elder,and, Not passing medications to 30 residents, and being out of my time limit due to dealing with humans,because the computer states your LATE! The LPN is a fading occupation up here, the majority of places i have looked in to want’s RN”s.
I am 56 years old, If someone would have suggested the thought of returning to school even so much as 3 years ago, I would have thought them crazy. The closer i get to my goal, the more relief I feel. I have total respect for all nurses, The changes i have witnessed these 22 years, just blows me away, To make one more comment, you don’t know what your getting in to in the health care setting, because it is always changing,I am personally ready to hang my hat & stethoscope up and hold on to the good memories.
So how do I know if I need to change careers…. I feel like this. I understand now that its normal.. But when does it point to maybe we are going in the wrong direction?
My suggestion is that if you have been in nursing for a couple of years and are very unhappy and experience daily dread over going to work, seek help. Look into other branches of nursing. As has been pointed out, there are many ways to practice nursing and you might not be in your niche yet.
If you try different branches of nursing and still don’t feel a good fit, consider returning for further education. Maybe you might enjoy teaching, administration, quality control or research. Or maybe you might want to choose a different path all together.
I generally like my job although it is stressful and there are often times like today when my body is REALLY sore from a couple of rough shifts. My personal plan is to pursue my NP degree in another year, so that when I reach my 50’s, I am off the floor and in a position that is kinder to my body.
I agree with all of this
I was a nurse full time and for 15 years held a full time and 1-2 others at the same time
You break your mind body and spirit and when your used up the world throws you away.
Love your nurses and aides. They do give all. They are turning you and loving you and cleaning you and helping your pain and calling your family and convincing them you need them They go into contagious situations and are fighting doctors for you and calling insurance companies and charting to make sure your medical bills are paid. Nurse and Aides are not sleeping and calling the next shift to check on you and thinking about your sick family members at their family meals and praying many times constantly and explaining to their tear faced babies why they have to leave on call and arguing with their spouses who have to finish the family night times routines or keep the driveway plowed a couple times the nights you have to drive on call to work ;and help you pack your medical supplies into their cars when your car breaks down. Please think about this with the added health care burdens and love your Aides and nurses.