The Effects of Nursing on Nurses
Hi, welcome to my blog post. I have never had a blog post get more than 50 comments, so I am a bit overwhelmed. After responding to many comments, here is a note:
Note: I wrote this blog entry at the end of my 3rd 12 hour shift in three days. I was tired and I was emotional. It is a blog post, not an “article.” It is not researched or sourced, it is purely opinion.
The point of this post is that nurses (and many other professions) need to take the time to practice self care and to encourage one another to practice self care.
My biggest mistake in this post (and there are many) was to use “her” or “she” when I should have used “they” or them.” I ignored my male coworkers, and I should not have. You have my apologies, and I have corrected the post. I have left “she” and “her” in place in the portion where I talk about my coworker.
I have read every comment posted and deleted some very nasty comments that were not helpful to conversation. If you feel this is the place to spew your vitriol, it is not.
August 11, 2013
This morning, while I was giving report to the day shift nurse taking over my patients, she burst into tears.
She’s going to miss her children’s hockey play offs due to our strictly enforced every other weekend schedules. You work every other weekend, no more, no less, unless you are going to college (I work every weekend because I’m in college). She’s their hockey coach, and inevitably, each year, their last game falls on a day their mother has to work. I’ve come in early for her before.
So I offered to come in on my night off for an hour and a half so she could get to the game. I’m coming in that early because I know she won’t be done charting.
She turned me down until another day RN got involved. I reminded my coworker I only live a mile from the hospital, and it really wasn’t a big sacrifice for me. She finally agreed, and calmed down. We got permission from the charge nurse.
Nursing is one of the largest professions in the world. If you don’t know a nurse, I’m really surprised. Nurses talk a lot about the rewards of nursing. Catching that vital sign, saving lives, providing comfort, but nurses, by nature, are taught to martyr themselves on the altar of nursing.
When I was a new grad, I hated coming to work so much that I would wish I’d get hit by a car on my way to work just to get out of work. One night, while checking medication sheets, I confessed this to some experienced nurses and found out some of them still felt the same way.
In nursing, it is NORMAL to have days where you wake up and just can’t mentally and emotionally face the day at work. I swear, the only other people who can understand this are nurses.
Nursing is emotionally, physically and mentally taxing, and some days you run too low on what you can give emotionally, physically and mentally. That minor back injury you don’t want to report to HR because you don’t want it on your record. Having a patient with constant diarrhea who can’t get out of bed and needs to be physically rolled and cleaned several times an hour. The cold you got from the two-year old someone brought in. The sorrow that comes from supporting someone who has just found out they were dying, holding in your own tears so you could wipe theirs. In one day, all of those patients could be yours.
I don’t know a nurse who hasn’t taken a mental health day. Some do it by requesting more vacation than others. Some do it by calling in sick, but it’s all time off because we are too drained to give anymore.
So if you know a nurse, and that nurse mentions to you that they feel like calling in because they just can’t take it another day, don’t give them a hard time. Especially if you have an 8-5 job with weekends off or some other really great schedule. The 12 hour shifts nurses work mean we miss the entire holiday we work with our families. Night shift nurses have to choose between holiday dinners or sleep. Often, if a nurse chooses to sleep rather than go to the holiday dinner, guilt ensues. Even though I’ve told my mother-in-law repeatedly that every nurse has to work holidays, she makes a point to say how horrible it is my husband has to be alone for a few hours. What about me? Working my ass off while everyone else celebrates?
We work hard. We are intentionally understaffed by our hospitals to improve profit, even if the hospital is a non-profit. We help people at the worst times of their lives, and often have no way to debrief, to get it off our chests. We don’t just bring warm blankets and pills. We are college educated, degreed professionals who are often treated like uneducated, lazy servants. We get sexually harassed by our patients. We get groped, punched, cut, I even know of a nurse on my floor being strangled (she survived).
Nursing can be rewarding. But nursing is a fucking hard job. If you are afraid of healthcare rationing, you should know it is already happening. Nurses are unable to give everyone the care they need, so patients with smaller problems may not get the same level of care. A nurse may be pressed to only give the minimum amount of care to a patient if they have 5 or more very sick patients. If you don’t want healthcare rationing, talk to your local hospitals about their nurse to patient ratios. Talk to your doctors. If you hear of legislation to support nurse to patient ratios, vote for it. Support it.
So if a nurse needs a day off, you support them. If you’re in a position to help like I was this morning, do so. If you are a nurse, go easier on yourself when you think about the things you didn’t finish, or the things you should have said. It’s a 24-hour a day job and you don’t have to do it alone.
As of January 27, 2014, this post is no longer accepting comments. I am doing this as a practice of self care. Tending to this blog post, several times a day, has become a burden. It has had over 2 million hits, and I am tired. The post has become a platform for people who want to propel their own agendas and are using my space to do so. Thanks to all who said such nice things, and to everyone else, go write your own blog.
Posted on August 11, 2013, in Nursing and tagged Health care, Nursing, registered nurse. Bookmark the permalink. 2,612 Comments.
ofcourseitsaboutyou 
I was impressed with this article. Yes, the nursing profession is a tough one,but so are many others. I have been a nurse for almost 33 years now. I have had my ups and downs, however, most have been rewarding. I started out young by taking care of my grandmother who had to have her wounds packed daily from a surgery she had, and decided that I wanted to help others. For the most part, nursing has become a way of life for me. Most people who meet me say “she must be a nurse.” I write like a nurse, I act like a nurse, my four children have grown up with the notion of nursing throughout their lives, and I will continue to be a nurse dedicated to caring for others. I have enrolled in a family nurse practitioner program and will continue until I can no longer work. I do not think there will be any retirement for me. One drawback to nursing is that there is not a strong retirement unless a person stays with the same institution for their entire career or have state or federal benefits. I have neither. However, the fact that I can have one person smile when they are in pain, or make a tiny bit of difference in a patient’s or family member’s life is a challenge and also is rewarding. I do not stop nursing when I am off the clock but must continue to care for my chronically ill youngest child. She is blind, cannot talk, must be fed and changed. She can walk with assistance, and has seizures almost daily. This can be exhausting. Even though she attends a day care center and I have some backup help, I still do not have much time for myself. When I do get some time for myself I like to take walks to enjoy a sunset or something in nature to get my mind off the troubles of humanity. Yes, nursing is not for the faint of heart, but it is a career that I have aspired to live up to.
I sympathize, however, the same can be said of many professions. I feel that the stresses inherent in the nurse’s service to their patients and interaction with a usually impersonal employer can give rise to a general malaise. But, as with the many that find that themselves in such a situation, the solution is in your own hands.
No…you can not compare the stresses of working in healthcare to “many professions”. How many other jobs outside of healthcare and emergency responders are you literally placed in life or death situations every day? Where any and every decision you make involves the possible outcome of the loss of a human life. So, no, the same can not be compared to ANY other profession and as a side note…rarely, in any profession, is the solution “in your own hands”.
Wow, really?! How dumb nurses must be to not have realized that gem of enlightenment this whole time!
Wth are you saying R Griffith? It’s views like yours that “give rise to general malaise.” Lol Did you use MS Office thesaurus? What you really needed was grammar check.
Obviously you didn’t get the point. Do not dismiss the pressures of having 8 or more sick people depending their lives on you as “stresses inherent in nursing”. The real stresses and sacrifices that nurses go through are never taught in school. If they did then they’ll never be able to staff the nursing shortage.
I feel that your reply was very unsympathetic and callous.
Clearly, you aren’t a nurse, R. Griffith.
Very well said!
What a terrific post. I have 32 years in the nursing business. I retired in 2010, however, I have had many many days where I wished I could be hit by a car or some other horrible incident, so I wouldn’t have to go to work. I’ve have had to work weekends, holidays and through soccer meets, plays, and even birthdays. It is no wonder that my now adult children know when their birthdays are or what day Christmas come on. It is only getting worse. Years ago it wasn’t as bad, the patients actually came first, before charting and they were a priority to the hospital as well. But in the 90’s the hospital started “Patient Centered Care” which I believe that everything was centered except the patient. They took away the LPN’s role and turned it in to PCT. They wanted to cross train everyone to do everything. How did this help the patient? It didn’t, what it did is put more responsibility on the nurses. And it never got any better, eventually the hospital made us all take classes to teach us how to make the patients feel like they are in “Disney Land”. Really? Unbelievable! I am sorry to say I am glad my nursing career is over and I feel bad for other who still continue on to fight the good fight for the patients. All I can say ” That time for yourself as much as possible, try and support each other as much as you can.
I have been an RN for 31 years (I’m 56 yrs old). I agree with your post and have enjoyed reading comments. I have worked in the ED and ICU most of my career….extremely high stress areas. I love my job, love caring for others and do encourage others to become nurses. I explain the good and the bad when doing so. The good thing about nursing is there are so many areas you can follow. And personally I think RNs make good money (although some would disagree). But going to college a minimum of 2 years and making between $45-90k isn’t bad. Some days I’m stressed and my feet & back hurt. Some days I cry with my patient and families. Other times I’m aggravated and angry with patients and families. But in the end, I wouldn’t change a thing.
I have been in nursing 29 years. Nurses are nasty to each other and patients’ families have gotten impossible over the past few years. The ridiculous amount of paperwork required by medicare and the state has nothing to do with patient care. Care plans are useless and she be removed. It can be a horrible job and after 29 years, I still have days that the thought of going to work makes me physically ill. #1 problem… too many women in the field.
Whine, whine, whine. There are tons of other professions that have shitty hours, get treated horribly, and are extremely difficult. You make it sound like nurses are the only ones who have it tough. Get over yourself.
Why don’t you and I switch jobs for 12 hours and we will see if your condescending attitude survives.
You really didn’t get the point of my post, which was that nurses (and other professions) need to encourage and practice self care among themselves.
Glad to know I’m not the only one who was punched, spit on, and scratched by a patient. But nursing has never been a glorious profession. As difficult as it may be to hold my bladder and my tears, I wouldn’t change a thing. I love what I do and I take pride in the care I give. Are nurses under appreciated? Absolutely. But you don’t join this profession to get a pat on the back. It’s a calling… and it takes a special, selfless person. If you’re in nursing for the recognition and “thanks”, you’re going to be grossly disappointed. That being said, when a patient takes the time to come back to the unit to give you a hug, or when a family member calls the unit at the end of your shift just to say “thank you”; those small gestures of gratitude mean so much more that people will ever realize.
I am an LPN studying for the RN degree. I have been a nurse for over 30 years now and I love what I do. I work in a nursing home, rehab center. Many have stated that you do not have time to go to the bathroom because you are busy taking care of your patients. Sometimes the job can be unrewarding.as patients can be really hateful and family members the same. You just but a smile on your face and continue taking care of them. I like working with my colleagues as a team we can get so much done. Some days it is impossible to get finished in the 12 hr time frame. So you have to stay over after your shift and finish and you don’t even get a thank you. Where I am now the DON is very special and she will help you this is really team work.
Thank you!!
Surely the pay is better now though? My mum did it for 5 years…cleaning soiled patients, lifting them on her own, dealing with all the emotional & physical aspects whilst other nurses sat and did nothing. She would have no money to feed herself, not even enough to get a bus back so would walk back on her own, in the dark, every day. Survining off of porridge and not much else.I absolutely agree that nurses should get time off but these days, it isnt just nurses, i know plenty of people who are working far harder than they should be, working weekends, no time for themselves or their children/partners. It should be an overall change but how is that possible when companies are tightening their budgets, dropping staff and extending hours? My work has made me extremely fit in the last year alone due to the intensity of it, i now have very little problems with tiredness even with a long term illness. Id say to any nurses out there, try to keep yourself as fit as possible. Ive seen a lot of bigger nurses, weight/unfitness will not help. I understand this comment must seem so rude but i dont mean to offend, i speak from experience. The fitter you are, the easier everything is.
Jess, I don’t know how old you are or how old your mother was when she was walking home from work, didn’t have enough to eat, only porridge ( sounds like Oliver Twist) or if she was even an RN but its the emotional toll. I started off as a nurses aide putting myself through school. I experienced all you say about your mother. I also worked in socialized medicine where the wages were meager. As for being “fit”, this is not about being fit. I am VERY fit but that does not compensate for all the hours I work or the wake up calls at 3 am because I’ve been paged to come in for an emergency. There are times I can’t eat because we’re too busy…… “Excuse me, can I take my lunch while you’re vomiting?” My son at 6 years old asked me, “Mom, who’s more important….. me or your patients?!” I LOVE my job. I can’t tell you the feeling that I get when I know a patient is being discharged home and I had participated in his care, but it’s being told I can’t leave to take care of my mother until a nurse comes back from vacation because we’re short staffed. huh??? My husband, through a bad business decision lost the company a large amount of money and they verbally beat him up for it…. he came home chin to his chest. I lost my patient that day. Its totally different emotions.
I also am not trying to offend but this is much more than being fit to fight off weariness or colds. I have tons of stamina. My job proves it.
Well, it’s not just stamina. The continuous heavy and emotional work builds up over time, and you get stress injuries from overwork. Doesn’t matter how correctly you lift or how good or strong you are, It’s a repetitive injury.
Well said!!!! I am thankful that my husband understands. We met at the place I was working as a nurse. He has seen me at wirk first hand taking care of his father (God bless his soul). I am lucky too that I have nursing friends that I can call and “debrief” or vent when I really need to and if no one else, lastly my husband will listen and hug me when I’m done. We nurses are hard on ourselves and since I have little kids at home, I too understand what it is like to miss games or social functions d/t work.
I am not a nurse. I read this blog post because a friend shared it on FB but also because I have several friends who are nurses, many of whom became my friends when my daughter was hospitalized. I spent months in the PICU at my baby girl’s side, so I saw day in and day out (night in and night out as well!) the incredible work they did on behalf of their patients. I grew to appreciate their friendship, yes, but also their professionalism, education, instinct, compassion, humor, and so much more. Nurses deserve more recognition for what they do.
After my sweet girl died, I took to writing (for a short time) to get my thoughts out and to process my grief. One piece I wrote centered on nurses and their impact on my life and my family’s lives. Perhaps if you read it (http://iaftere.blogspot.com/2012/07/in-appreciation-of-nurses.html), you will be reassured that the work you do is so valuable to so many, and not just to your patients. God bless!
If you feel like you don’t want to come into work, perhaps you should consider a different field. Maybe nursing is not for you or maybe you lost interest in the job. A great deal of people go into the medical field for the money, but do not actually care about helping people.
Do not misunderstand being emotionally drained by helping people at the worst times in their lives for lack of love of our jobs…..it is not the same thing. I love my job, and I love, love being there for people in their time of need, I think that only caregivers, nurses, and CNA’s can truly understand how much you can love something that takes so much from you mentally and emotionally.
I think that Respiratory Therapist that do their job can also have the same emotions! I have for 16 years and have always been short staffed and overworked almost daily! I love what I do and would not have it any other way! I always put my patients first when I am at work.
Well put, Brennykaye!! I typed and re-typed my response to Will, but just couldn’t do it without getting madder and madder and telling him to bugger off!! Happy New Year!!
Will, you are a jerk. This person never said they “lost interest” they are describing how the job takes an emotional toll on a person. I seriously doubt any of the RNs i know went into the medical field for the money as you stated. My daughter is a RN, i know what she is paid! I work at a phone company and we have technicians that make more than her and they did not spend 4 years and $80,000 to get a degree. Maybe when you make comments you should stick to something you are familiar with.
Obviously you think money is made as a nurse, which Not why most do it… How would you like to be that patient “left behind”!!!! Litrally!
Will, I feel you missed the point ENTIRELY. You can love the work you do but be so exhausted that you need time off. Goodness knows, really? Because you are exhausted and work your tail off you say change professions. Higher ups make choices about our work environment, and it can change at the drop of a hat. We do our job for the patient,. We just need to know we are not super heroes and need some down time.
And a great deal of people make ignorant thoughtless comments. Look! There’s one right there!^^^ . Getting run down by a high-stress job does not mean you don’t care about helping people. It means you’re human and your resources are finite. As someone whose life was saved by an ER nurse THANK YOU.
Great article , As nurses we meed to be more supportive.
Much the same can be said for nurse aids aka PCA aka STNA, except for the amount of education. Nurse aids do more lifting changing wiping cleaning and take more physical and verbal abuse than anybody should have to endure, yet they are the lowest paid most overworked, misjudged unappreciated work force of the health care industry. If you know a nurse aid smile on him or her and know that at some point in your life, chances are very high that you will need the above mentioned services. If you are receiving such services, do your best to be kind to them. Do not judge or insult them, or cause them to have to grind their teeth or bite their own tongues . Such efforts can compromise quality of care, rendering them unable to remember things like reporting important information to the nurse in a timely manner, rendering them vulnerable to the need for a mental health day off, and thus leaving the facility that much more understaffed. Everybody has his or her own cross to bear,
I worked as an RN in hospital settings from !983to1998. I loved what I did but hated the environment in which I did it. I spent the drive to work every day in prayer. I prayed for my patients,my co-workers,the doctors and myself. The one thing I can add to the original blog is being told to never let “her”(the head nurse) know if we had an orthopedic problem. Being a compliant employee I put up with a problem for over a year. I lost all ROM in my dominant arm before I sought medical attention (and it got back to her.) End result: surgery that resulted in a permanent disability. I will never work again in nursing or any other profession. To any nurses who read this…Please take a mental health day when you need one! Please take care of yourself despite what your boss or the hospital thinks. They will let you go in the blink of an eye. No one else will take care of you. Your”friends” at work WILL disappear. Please please take good care of yourself! I am blessed with a loving spouse and supportive family. Not everyone is.
Great post, I have been a hospital security officer and have seen and protected. Many nurses over the years, I don’t know how you do it…but I’m glad to stand by you as a team member and have and will continue to jump in between my nurses and the unstable violent patients ….keep up the great work nurses
I have noticed that many of the contributing RNS work several 12 hour shifts per week. An 8 hour shift is long enough given the responsibility of the RNs. I know that there are RNS who fought for 12 hour shifts so they could have 4 days off, however the longer shift has an effect on the care given, and the health, emotional and physical, of the RN ( or LPN or CNA). I know that when I would work overtime, it was severely draining, and I have yet to understand how an RN does multiple 12 hour shifts and maintains sanity. When I was a manager, I would not allow schedule changes to support 12 hour shifts. I accommodated my staff in other ways, assuring that they could get to that game, or other special occasion. Al.so, with all staff working only 8 hour shifts, they were not tired and resentful and readily employed flexibility in changing shifts with co-workers so that one could get to that special event. In the 10 years that I was a manager of a very busy, capricious unit, there was not even one complaint filed with the union. Everyone worked together, and if there were an issue, we talked it out, and came up with a solution. The staff was terrific. I would like to add that the RNs on this unit respected the CNAs and worked well with them. A topic for research is the reason for my next statements..Most of the RNS had at least a BS, and some of the CNAs did. For some, nursing was a second career. We had a few male RNs, most were either muscians, visual artists, and or writers in addition to the profession of nursing..Among the other RNS we had a prior social worker, botanist, rec therapist, business administrator, public health agency administrator, English teacher. Whether additional life’s experiences, and or only the 8 hour shifts made the difference, I do not know. That is why I am suggesting research topics. I also repeat what I mentioned in an earlier post, non-nurses should not be making decisions for nurses and nursing.
Bless you, Joann. You as a manager made the difference!!
The original post was great but didn’t get to core problem.
Some nurses should never have become nurses, and nurses have always been stressed for different reasons. Double shifts with a large number of patients and no intensive care units were common in the 60s when I started. But patients are more critically ill today and nurses cannot be slow of mind or feet.
I’ve objected to nurses voting to turn their schedule into 12 hour shifts so they could have long weekends. it stays that way even when new staff come who don’t like it. Administration shouldn’t allow this because nurses need to be mentally sharp even after 11.5 hours of work. My lawyer son has worked hard for longer hours but his decision-making isn’t life-and-death at the 12th hour. I worked harder as a waitress but the stress was different.
The public must become aware of research that shows you are more likely to die, no matter what diagnosis you have, each time the RN-to-patient ratio increases above 4. Many deaths have occurred when a nurse was too tired to catch early signs of problems or makes a medication error. It doesn’t matter who your doctor is if you don’t have good nursing care!!!!!!!!!!!
Most Nursing Homes and Hospitals are owned by corporations that need to make money (even if they are called “non-profit”) and they do this by cutting back on the biggest expense which is nursing staff. If nurses are overworked and the patient complains, administrators will chastise nurses on that unit and train them “again” in customer relations instead of adding another nurse or improving the unit manager.
It’s critical to YOUR LIFE that your nurse is happy and not overworked.
Bless you, Joann. You as a manager made the difference!!
The original post was great but didn’t get to core problem.
Some nurses should never have become nurses, and nurses have always been stressed for different reasons. Double shifts with a large number of patients and no intensive care units were common in the 60s when I started. But patients are more critically ill today and nurses cannot be slow of mind or feet.
I’ve objected to nurses voting to turn their schedule into 12 hour shifts so they could have long weekends. it stays that way even when new staff come who don’t like it. Administration shouldn’t allow this because nurses need to be mentally sharp even after 11.5 hours of work. My lawyer son has worked hard for longer hours but his decision-making isn’t life-and-death at the 12th hour. I worked harder as a waitress but the stress was different.
The public must become aware of research that shows you are more likely to die, no matter what diagnosis you have, each time the RN-to-patient ratio increases above 4. Many deaths have occurred when a nurse was too tired to catch early signs of problems or makes a medication error. It doesn’t matter who your doctor is if you don’t have good nursing care!!!!!!!!!!!
Most Nursing Homes and Hospitals are owned by corporations that need to make money (even if they are called “non-profit”) and they do this by cutting back on the biggest expense which is nursing staff. If nurses are overworked and the patient complains, administrators will chastise nurses on that unit and train them “again” in customer relations instead of adding another nurse or improving the unit manager.
It’s critical to YOUR LIFE that your nurse is happy and not overworked.
This post wants me to “moderate my comment” but everything I said is accurate. Are they objecting to my saying that research shows that patients are more likely to die regardless of their diagnosis, as the RN-to-patient ratio increases? This is true. And it is true that the corporate owner of health-care facilities have to make some “revenue” even if “non-profit.” The chosen place to cut budget is at the place of biggest expense and that is nursing staff.
The legislature in California passed laws regarding the RN-to-patient ratio and we need that in all states. What I said is true that it’s critical to YOUR LIFE that your nurse is not overworked.
You are right on! I think all nurses at one point in time or another has felt this exact way. And while we do need to take care of ourselves, we do feel guilty about it, so we DO need to be there for each other, even if its encouraging another to call in 😉 only so much a person can take. I’m sure doctors and other medical professionals have similar issues, but as nurses, we are the ones w/ a hell of a lot more patient contact then any other.
May God bless u with many more healthy years to bless others!!
As I am getting ready to go into work as I read this on New year’s eve and leave my family at home again on another holiday I wish I would have just been a teacher. I feel like a horrible mother most days leaving my 3 girls with my amazing husband. I became a nurse to help people when all it seems to do is make me bitter. Don’t get me wrong I love what I do. I just hate what it does to my family and as nurses we get very little reward for all that we sacrifice.
What do you mean by “wished I would have just been a teacher?” Teachers may not work the same hours but they have stresses that cause them to feel many similar emotions! I grew up in a family of nurses and know what it’s like to be the family member waiting at home. I also know what it’s like to be the teacher who missed out on my own kids activities because I need to coach someone else’s child. Each profession deserves respect.
Nicole, nurses are teachers.
During the last ten months, my husband (who has literally never been sick) has undergone treatment for cancer, followed by CABGx4. I cannot even begin to express our gratitude for the amazing care he has received, both in the hospital and in his treatment centers! There are no words to describe the compassion and skill of the nursing professionals who have been by our side during this journey. In my opinion, twelve-hour shifts are much too long for individuals responsible for the lives of their patients. Just watching them perform their duties was enough to make me tired (and glad that I changed my college major)!! THANK YOU to all whose lives are devoted to the care of others!!!
I see my wife go through through this regularly.
Very well written.
I spent 50 yrs of my life not as a nurse but a nurses assistant…aide….tech!! And let me tell you…these care givers….and when I was doing it we were actually allowed to touch patients…..have the same issues!! So don’t leave us out!! My mother, all 3 of my sisters and various other family members have also spent many, many yrs as care givers!! On the upside….we raised 2 RN’s!! And who knows how many others would go to school if they could afford it….2 grand-daughters of mine would love to be nurses!!
I am a CNA and understand understaffing and overworking very first hand. Most nights on my shift at the nursing home I had an entire wing of at least 25 patients with five baths, 13 feeders and turning, diapering, and laundry duties in between. Many nights the other two aides who were scheduled would both call out and I would have 82 patients for 8 hours by myself with no LPN after 9pm and no doctor that could be reached when a patient coded. All of this was against state law which stated their could be no more than 10 patients per aide per shift and I reported them several times to no avail. I had to sign a certificate that I would administer insulin shots and if anything adverse happened as a result of the shot I would be fired AND lose my license to work as a CNA, because as a CNA I was not licensed to give meds of any kind much less shots. I was a single mother (husband in jail)with four children at home and some nights I brought my two youngest with me to work and put them to bed in spare rooms at the nursing home because I couldn’t afford to pay an overnight sitter. I hope conditions have improved at least somewhat since I worked there however this is not according to the information I have gathered recently. When I left the nursing home job I went to home health and I have appreciated being able to take the time with each patient as needed for proper care.
We need to be more supportive as nurses. Our goal is safety. If your co-worker has a question regarding an order. Don’t be judgemental. Stop criticize each other.The job is already stressful let us work together
This was really great! I have a nurse friend who re-posted it on FB, and I took a minute to read it and loved what you had to say. So simple, and yet so powerful. I cried a lil too as it’s so well articulated. Keep up the good work, and thank you for choosing a field which you are clearly suited for and taking care of us common people.
This is why I no longer desire to work as a nurse. I worked so hard to put myself thru nursing school and now I would rather work at McDonalds. After 14 years of being constantly stressed, sick, and under appreciated I AM DONE
Bravo to you for your courageous post! While I am not a nurse, I understand your plight implicitly. I am an attorney who primarily handles cases of alleged child abuse. No one (except, perhaps, other attorneys who do this work) empathizes with my clients. Consequently, it is with little more than the blink of an eye that my clients have their children taken away.
I listen, with empathy and compassion, all day every day to blood-curdling screams, suicidal drones and ceaseless hopelessness. It is mentally, physically and emotionally exhausting.
In lawyering, litigators suffer more pressure than transactional attorneys. In litigation, family law litigators suffer more time-pressure and emotional turbulence than other litigators. In family litigation, custody matters take the greatest toll on the lawyers. And, in custody litigation, parental defense attorneys ensure the most psychologically taxing, emotionally draining, highly consequential of all legal practice. And, I do this all day, every day, usually 7 days a week, and usually without the prestige and esteem that my profession commands.
It is the greatest reward from God that he led me to the path to do this work. But yes, it destroys me, piece by piece. I have missed more family events, holiday celebrations and simple weekend afternoons of rest than can be counted. I have gained an extraordinary amount of weight. I earn a nice living, but not nearly nice as my resume might suggest — largely because it is nearly impossible to abandon a client whose status as “oppressed by the State” or “wrongfully accused” renders them penniless after my fee, and those of necessary experts and other professionals are involved.
And, for my success, I receive quite a bit of “hate mail” on my BLOG and in my email inbox. It hurts, only making the process that much more difficult.
I share this because I see into your soul with your words above. I live those words. For “caring” professions – nurses, teachers, hospice workers, childcare providers, and yes, parent defense lawyers – you rarely make it through your career without the wounds of others becoming imbedded in you. It takes its toll.
But, it sounds to me like you have been similarly blessed to have found your calling. Thank you for all that you do to care for others.
Sincerely,
Allison
Good health is included in the life, liberty and pursuit of happiness we are all promised. Just as we have come to believe that it is the job of the government to keep us safe from criminals and attack from outside the borders I believe that health care can only be provided to all if the profit motive is removed and we begin to expect that poor health care is intolerable. That means we develop and enlist in a Medical Service Corps, we get educated for free with a service requirement and no body gets rich doing unnecessary procedures.
Boy did that strike a cord or remberance. I remember working 3 12 hour shifts and then getting a call to please come in for someone who was sick. It was the norm to work 5 12 hour shifts in a row. My son is an RN and he says it still happens. I worked in Hospice and at the end for 9 months worked 16 to 20 hours a day. My body burned out and I ended up in the hospital for 2 weeks. We are definately martyrs and need to take care of ourselves. Also, we need to have good disability insurance because 3 seconds can change our lives forever. It happened to me and now I’ve been totally disabled for 10 years unable to ever work again.
This is a great article and so true!!! The hospital gets to decide WHEN and WHO I get to spend my holidays with!! I have been a nurse for over 30 years- and my son comes out with an accounting degree and makes more than me the first year!! And to the paramedic who didn’t think nursing was bad- I was a paramedic also- before nursing- I enjoyed that job- people were thankful you were there! I have nothing left to give- I quit in December- and it has been a great weight off my shoulders !!! Support nurses- they can save your life!
My daughter is a nurse. I am soooo proud of her. I do understand her needing some down time. So any time I can help her I am happy to do it. Kudos to all nurses !!!!!
I work in a very busy ER and there are days that when I get off work I sit in my car and cry. Sometimes it is over a pt that I have lost, and then there are the days that I have been so overwhelmed and felt that I could not give good care to any of my pts and I am thanking god that nobody died due to the nurses neglect. Yes there are thankless days, but there is always that one pt that is the most sweetest, kindest pt and you wish they could all be like that. Then there is always that physician who thinks you are an octopus and have 8 arms and is barking orders at you. I have learned to calmly say to that physician “if you cannot see, I am busy with another task but when I am finished I would be more than happy to do that for you.” Usually calms his hot head down.
There are days that it is a thankless job, but more often than not at least once a day I get that pt and family that are so appreciative of the good care it makes it all worthwhile.
Not a nurse, but know a lot of them. I love them every one, and NEVER let them leave my room without sincerely thanking them for what they (and the CNTs, RTs, yes, even food service staff and housekeeping) have just done for me while I could not do something for myself. I often wonder how well they can take care of themselves when they are so hard pressed to keep up with the demands of so many patients. I can never thank all of you enough for what you go through.
Just wanted to leave my 2 cents:
I’ve been an RN for a little over a year working on a stepdown unit (in a non-union hospital). In that year, Our ratios have increased from 1:4, to 1:5 (and a few rare occasions 1:6). Bear in mind, we take trach-vent patients, vasoactive drips (NO titrating), cardiothoracic patients with TEA catheters, neurosurgery cases, etc.
All of the other local hospitals have increased shift pay for 12.5 hours… we still only get paid for 12. Any RN in an acute care setting knows that 12 hour shifts are a crock. 12.5-13hrs is the minimum, depending on acuity and ratios.
Due to a high turnover and short-staffing, we’re literally yelled at for calling in sick… which is unfortunate due to the fact that I’ve been rundown quite a bit this year.
Due to other budgetary shortcomings, we’re constantly looking for equipment. All of the nurses on my unit, and myself included, feel our time is better spent than trying to track down an SCD machine or an IV pump for 2 hours.
All we ask is that we’re staffed and equipped properly. It makes our jobs more doable and it increases quality of care.
Recently, our hospital has come under new management. We were all given notice that “negative employees” will not be tolerated. Our manager informed us that includes complaining. WE SHOULD BE COMPLAINING. Unsafe staffing and broken equipment is not tolerable and we shouldn’t be complacent about it.
And what scares me is I work at one of the nicer hospitals…
Wow, what a wonderful post. I am a RN in Australia with 40 years on the job and still working in the healthcare profession. It seems no matter what country you are in the issues remain the same. I have had a wonderful varied career in nursing and seen many changes over the years, some good some hideous but here I remain. You really have hit the nail on the head and I agree with everything you have said. While I love my job my biggest struggle is the guilt I feel when I get home that I have little emotional energy left to give my family and find many times thinking ‘ OMG can’t you just leave me alone and stop asking for things!’. I find when asked a question at work I take great pains in giving concise informative answers and detailed repetitive instructions yet am almost monosyllabic by the time I get home. My feet are swollen and sore, my back aches and my eyes burn. I get out of my car and wonder how I am going to find the energy to walk in the door and quite often find myself subconsciously saying ‘ smile……….they don’t know what your day has been like and it’s not their fault!. Yet 40 years down the track I’m still here! There’s got to be something in it that keeps us turning up each day. I am very proud to be a nurse but we need to learn to have some ‘ me time’ and be kind to ourselves. When I find out how to do that I will let you know.
Cheers from Australia.
Oh and just to add, I was an EMT before I became a nurse. There are a different set of challenges in EMS VS. Nursing.
That being said, there CAN be some down time in EMS, whereas in nursing, depending on the type of unit you’re on, it could literally be nonstop for 12.5 hrs.
In Brian’s defense, however, Medic pay is irrationally low. And the educational requirements to maintain one’s certification are much heavier.
It’s easier to renew my RN license than it is to refresh my EMT… which is just madness.
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Great post! I work 8 hour shifts 5 days a week (I’d much rather work 12 most days and have a shorter work week, but sometimes its nice to be off by 330, or close to that) and its hard to explain to friends and family why I am so exhausted all the time. Work isn’t just physically taxing, its emotionally and mentally exhausting too! I helped a co-worker out and worked X-mas eve for her when I was already also working X-mas, she’s a single mom and couldn’t find anyone to watch her son and my managers response to her working both days was, “Maybe you’ll get to spend next X-mas with your son.” Terrible, I know! So I wanted to help her even though I have multiple families to visit on both days as well!
I used to work in the nursing progression I can put my hand on my heart and say the 5 years I worked I can relate to everything. Nurses do a great job for carp pay they need better pay and more support in my view.
I couldn’t believe this post… the part about wanting to have an accident to avoid working. I felt this way Dec 24 going in for a night shift. The hospital is stressful for me because of how the nurses gossip about each other and clique together leaving some out. I love my job so much, and my patients too but don’t appreciate the lack of teamwork by some and the outright bullying by others.
WHY RUIN A PERFECTLY WELL WRITTEN MESSAGE BY USING A DIRTY 4-LETTER WORD?? 😦 FOR THAT REASON, I FEEL LIKE NOT PASSING IT ON…SURELY YOUR VOCABULARY IS MORE EXTENSIVE THAN THAT!
This is my blog. It’s not written for you, it’s written for me. You don’t have to read it. MOVE ON.
Love your blog!!
I am sorry I have to chime in. If you have EVER spent five minutes in healthcare you would know that the word FUCK is yelled at you many times a week by patients, residents, family or said by other staff. If you cannot handle that then obviously you have too thin of skin to be in the healthcare field!
Thank you for your blog post. I, as a Registered Nurse, understand your post. Isn’t it interesting how we all feel? We give our time, emotions, body…………. so many waking hours to nursing. Yet, incivility is an ongoing issue in nursing. We all feel this way, yet we judge the fellow co-worker that desperately needs an extra day or a weekend off. How is it that we have put ourselves in this box? You really stepped up by offering a solution and showing that nurses can and should be civil and UNDERSTANDING to each other.
This was everything I needed after the 12-hour shift I had yesterday. Sometime we do need a mental health day. Sometimes we do need a day off. Not only are we taking care of others, but we need to take care of ourselves as well. Sometimes I wish others could understand that, and appreciate the things that nurses, and others that work in the healthcare field do.
This is a very sad blog. Yes,nursing is tough and unappreciated by many, but can be very rewarding too. I have been a nurse over 32 years. I have missed soccer games, birthday parties, and holidays. But, in the trenches with me, were my coworkers! Regardless how tough it got, we always had each others’ backs. Maybe a new career should be a choice for you?! I truly believe a person cannot be trained to be a good nurse, they have to be born that way!
You clearly missed the blogger’s point! She loves her job, is simply stating we need to support each other and take care of our selves in the process ( And hopefully get a lot more support from the organizations we work for by improving nurse to patient ratios). If nurses could just suck it up and move on, we wouldn’t have very many nurses or very many caring nurses. Those who find it difficult are probably the nurses who care deeply about what they do.
Why 12 hour shifts?
Perhaps, you would be less burnt out and would feel better on 8’s? How do u advocate for yourself within the workplace? As nurses we make critcal decisions and constantly have to problem solve and multitask for the wellbeing of our patients. Would the quality of the care you provide improve on an 8hour schedule?
Brianna, I’m an 8 hour nurse, and it does help A LOT to have shorter shifts. We can do this in the ER, where we’re staffed up during busy periods.
A lot of nurses want those 12 hour shifts for various reasons, but I don’t think I could handle my job if I were required to go to 12 hours. I come in at 11 pm, and by 4 am I see the 12 hour people (who were there since 7) begin to wilt.
I totally agree. I worked as a CNA for three years, then began prerequisites to earn my RN until one fateful night when my daughter was suicidal, and I was her only link to life. I got permission from my charge nurse to leave early, and I had all of my residents covered by other helpful CNAs. But, admin happened to be on the floor (this was 9 pm), and insisted that my leaving put the residents at risk, that I was abandoning them, which was not true. I left anyway. My daughter was the one at risk. I lost my job. I have since decided that, as much as I care for people, nursing is not for me. I am committed to my family too much. Nursing would have forced me to compromise my family, and I’m not willing to do that. Cheers for those who stay on, and – YES! – let’s support anything that evens out the nurse-to-patient ratio, and puts a muzzle on over-zealous administration. I believe that they actually fired me because I had sent them two letters describing the situation on the floor over the prior few months. I was a risk to their operation, and my daughter’s situation was the perfect scape goat. btw, my daughter lived. It turned out to be extreme post-partum depression, but it took a full week for her to stabilize to the point that I could leave her alone. She even had a doctor’s note to that effect, that she was to be with an adult at all times, but even that wasn’t good enough for admin. Sigh. It begs the question: What will it take to change this???
Wow, I am so sorry you lost your job because someone (your own daughter) was at risk. It is unbelievable how discompassionate facilities can be.
I have been a nurse for almost 40 years. I love it and would not want to do anything else. However, GrimalkinRN hit the nail on the head. Nurses are drained daily on a physical, mental, and emotional level. It is so important that we support each other and that families and friends who understand support us because (in general) administration certainly does not.
Janet Plock -Trostle.. I searched through that article and I’m damned if I could find an expletive that was objectionable. I am reminded of a young female friend who took on a vacation job as a tour guide taking tourists to the outback of Australia. One group of U S Southern young belles climbed aboard and one inadvertently dropped her bag on Lisa’s foot. “Jesus Christ that hurt.” whereupon the teenager, without apologising, remonstrated at (to her) the blasphemy. Lisa responded with. ” We are heading out west into the “Outback” and out there that would be considered polite conversation. If you can’t take it I suggest you get off and take the next flight home.” Australians are not as overly polite as Americans and tend to be truthfully direct.I still don’t know what that word was,if it exists, but the article contained a lot more truisms than a single word.
I am not a nurse but have been on the receiving end, and for my money they are the best people in the world.